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Dark Poetry #3
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Acoustic guitar
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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Acoustic guitar |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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Lift up this soft box of hearts, the soapstone letters of your passing days and nights among a room of light and dust. Find the notes like silver coins spinning somewhere by themselves with the shadow cents they bring to you. Play a song like fractured rainbows about a girl who painted canvas white or black, left it blank or dark. Taste with her that map of glass and feathers. Rust and paint and chains. Seams and nails and mirrored face. Sheets of notes in score. Find the chords and let them burn as sunlight on a beach of stones. Collect yourself from the color of the tidepool near that shore. Stream along as fingers flex and soothe the metal strung and rung. Wring out all the watered blood. Sit back. Lay down this soft box of hearts. They fluttered for you, passing by. Now let their whispered beats comfort you to sleep. [This message has been edited by bsquirrel (08-09-2002 03:00 PM).] |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
This was truly your best and I hate saying that because you could take it as the others were not wonderful as well. So please understand I mean this as a true compliment, this is outstanding. Each coupling of sentences could stand on it's own. Truly incredible. I enjoyed this very much. In truth, what defines us is our poetry. |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Oh my goodness... this is absolutely outstanding! This is one of the best poems I have read in Passions in Poetry in a long time... the way it was all written in imperative statements, the organization and wording... it just worked perfectly for the entire poem. This is very inspiring and I commend you on it completely... Especially the dark, ominous feeling that it emenated... you did an outstanding job of setting a mood... What an accomplishment of a poem, this is. You should be very proud... I'm extremely impressed...  I will be reading your poetry from now on.Parasite [This message has been edited by Local Parasite (08-09-2002 06:03 PM).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Lift up this soft box of hearts, the soapstone letters of your passing days and nights among a room of light and dust. Find the notes like silver coins spinning somewhere by themselves with the shadow cents they bring to you. =================================== Find the chords and let them burn as sunlight on a beach of stones. Collect yourself from the color of the tidepool near that shore. Stream along as fingers flex and soothe the metal strung and rung. Wring out all the watered blood. Sit back. Lay down this soft box of hearts. They fluttered for you, passing by. Now let their whispered beats comfort you to sleep. ================================ You are so perceptive and so dimensional..you make the reader feel your words..not just see them...but feel their textures and layers...I swear you have magic glasses...made from ocean waves and night breezes..falling stars... You are so gifted my squirrely poet pal. Im so glad you came back and share your work again..my tired mothy soul needed the enlightenment.  If all the tear drops went to heaven |
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moshpit Member
since 1999-11-25
Posts 143cebu, philippines |
it's beautiful.. the guitar is one of my favorite subjects but i can never write a decent piece about it.. this is beautiful writing, bsquirrel.. |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486 |
Very Beautiful...as always.... DeaDiAmore |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now |
You wrote this a day after I had Tyler over at my house, proving that you can rage on an acoustic guitar, y'know. After I played Midnight Beauty for him and he proclaimed it was my best ever. We need t' get you a stringed instrument. Love yr writing. Love you. Is this what you wanted me to be? |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
hmmm, awesome, but all I get out of my acoustic is aborted chords and misspelled melodies practicepracticepractice.... nice squirrelsong BS I never aimed at reality; I aimed at truth. --Orson Welles |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
I have to ditto all of the above. This is one of your finest, squirrel dude. Sheesh! ~wranx The shortest distance between two points... |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
it IS my favorite instrument--not that I can make it sing like this-- I hesitate to call this your best--you have so many that resonate to my many moods. So many times I've read your words to find you've given voice to something I thought inexpressible. Do you know how talented you are? |
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Purity Senior Member
since 2001-11-20
Posts 526Once Upon, USA |
And yet that fractured tune I play over and over is but of mirrors... The rainbow reference was nothing short of perfect And the acoustics of my psycho world are what keep me afloat on a breeze. This was a most outstanding encore, friend. |
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Moon Dust
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177Skelmersdale, UK |
I feel the same way about playing my keyboard you really summed it up. I argee with every one else because it was so deep. If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come? |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Not bad for someone who can't play the guitar for crap, huh? |
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