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Dark Poetry #3
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Sometimes I'd like to give up
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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Sometimes I'd like to give up |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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Sometimes I'd like to give up my eyes, have each lash removed and spread down like seeds. The lids can be used to hold coins or pills. The lenses can make up some part of a window. Sometimes I'd like to give up my hair, have each strand removed and planted like roots. The long pieces can be used to string a bass. The short pieces can make up the stuffing for pillows. Sometimes I'd like to give up my voice, have each word removed and sealed in a jar. The consonants can be used to grapple for meaning. The vowels can make every turn of the lid. Sometimes I'd like to give up my blood, have each drop removed to speckle the sun. The red cells can be used to paint silent frames. The white cells can draw a canvas in sand. Sometimes I'd like to give up my skin, have each pore removed to follow reflections. My palms can be used to bestow your prayers. The bottoms of my feet will lie among cobbles. Sometimes I'd like to give up my bones, have each rib removed to make a new cage. My skull can be used to dam up the river. My cochlea can be made into percussive notes. Sometimes I'd like to give up nothing. Have each silence removed and replaced by joy. My mind can be used among this terrain. My soul will be made to fly through this rain. Said if I only could ... -KB |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
and a sunbeam followed by a moonshadow...smiling. Don't know why I insist on struggling either. Everytime I do, I just end up with a lungful of ocean!  ever your ardent fan, mike!  |
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MIdsummerRain Member
since 2002-05-19
Posts 175St. Louis, Missouri |
Out of all of you work -this- is the most amazing piece that I have come to find; All of it, Everything is Phenomenal; There are more than just words here, Emotion, Humanity, Power it includes all of these & so much more; This is truly Inspiring ~Rayne One day Men will look back & say that I gave birth to the 20th Century Jack the Ripper ~1888 [This message has been edited by MIdsummerRain (08-06-2002 03:29 AM).] |
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
Sometimes I'd like to give up nothing. Have each silence removed and replaced by joy. My mind can be used among this terrain. My soul will be made to fly through this rain. Incredible is all I can say. When I read the title I expected something quite dark and dreary. This was a delightful surprise. Enjoyed. Love Seduces Joy From The Heart |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now |
Thank you for the turnaround, baby. I was daydreaming so hardcore last night, I don't know if I actually finished my job... Hmm. Oh well. And if you really wanna give up all those awesome things like your eyes and hair and voice (and blood), I'll gladly keep 'em. (More.) That is, of course, until you want 'em back. Is this what you wanted me to be? |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Thanks, everyone, for enjoying my moment of nihilistic transcendence. I didn't even know that was possible until I wrote it down.And Lori, yr cruel! I love it.  Said if I only could ... |
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Anvrill Senior Member
since 2002-06-21
Posts 710in the interzone now |
Did I mention that you'd need to ask for 'em back reeeaaalll nice? Is this what you wanted me to be? |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Great work squirrel dude. You just keep movin' onward. Sometimes, I'd like to give up my pen Have it's little roller thing go under the couch The ink could make a pattern on my jeans It's body wrwapped with foil, can be a pipe It hasn't been much good to me anyway Aw, Jeez! ~wranxy The shortest distance between two points... |
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Jessica
since 2001-06-28
Posts 350South AL |
Great write Mikey... I have to agree - this is the best I have seen from you. I like the change of mood here. ~Jess |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Lori, awww. Wranx, we all hit those times. I had to start writing every day to end it. And sometimes, what I write isn't fit to see the light, so I erase it. Or I read. Readin' always helps me get ideas. Jessica, nice to see you again. Glad you enjoyed. Mikey "I fall into your arms." |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486 |
I really enjoyed this one as I do all your work bsquirrel....your such a great poet! DeaDiAmore |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
 Thanks, DDA. So are you. "Oh you've got green eyes. Oh you've got blue eyes. Oh you've got grey eyes." -New Order |
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devina Member Elite
since 1999-10-28
Posts 3539Cali |
Sometimes the giving seems easier Mikey boy..but? always remember the TAKING is even better...grins.. loved this!! "Sometimes I'd like to give up my bones, have each rib removed to make a new cage." I'd have to ditto that!! have a good night man!!! Open arms can be the most fragile in the world... |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Cool! Thanks for the reply, devina! (I'm slowly working through these replies -- oops)Mike |
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