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| Teen Poetry #4 |
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anomaly187 Member
since 2000-06-15
Posts 284San Francisco,CA,US |
wasn't going to post a poem today but i had some free time to sit down and write a little.. Lock me up in a box and send me into the ground I'll drink whatever's seeping out of me Please cover me with a cloth I wouldn't want to be seen Lock me up with the flies so they can have a feast Wouldn't know where i've been my bones are starving to mean something that's so pristine Lock me up with the tools where i can taste your cold-hearted metal plunging into me Lick my fetal remains when they are scraped clean when you thought i would vanish I was dug up and forced right into you Now i sleep in the sky in your tight weakened prison and i watch wherever you go 'cause in the end when everythings been said and done I will find you and i will be born again "When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro" |
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| © Copyright 2001 Alexei - All Rights Reserved | |||
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the day i tried to live Junior Member
since 2001-02-03
Posts 27the seventh circle |
exquisitely disturbing... two thumbs and a severed toe up  |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Wow! I love it! Very descriptive. Lots of wonderful metaphors. This is the second entry into my library. Thanks for the read! -Allan We used to hate people, now we just make fun of them. It's more effective that way. --KMFDM |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
VERY nicely done here ano.......I liked this a lot. You are king of DISTURBING poetry hahaha.....I liked it.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. I'm in love with my shadow I admire it daily |
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jeremydraul Senior Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 1118State of Despair |
I love dark poetry. I read too much of this happy, prissy BS stuff. Thanks for widening my eyes! Your work is so very elegant. -Jeremy "I believe that man will not merely endure: he will prevail. -William Faulkner (Noble Prize Speech.) |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
I can't give any constructive criticizm to this. It is perfect as it is. You're very talented I see no changes, wake up in the morning I ask myself, "Is life worth living or should I blast myself" TUPAC SHAKUR |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
wow! your are very talented with dark poetry. for some reason i get abortion from this poem, but im not quiet sure. it was very dark and disturbing a good. regina when i wish for you, i wish that could we lie side by side hearts entwined. |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
just wantwed to put it in my libary regina for those who say I'm their friend, u know me not well for if u did u would not stay around anymore to watch me fall away. |
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