Aftershock - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Grinch
Member Elite

since 2005-12-31

Posts 2929
Whoville

0 posted 2006-10-05 06:01 PM

After the slow death the silence leaps
On ears that need the lullaby of screams
To feel at home.
She, as mad as worms, has turned
Her tongue to younger men, too weak
To taste her poison passed as cheap perfume.

After the crash of doors the emptiness;
The lack of hate can pluck the nerves
And leave you cold.
While she, as wild as wheat, is swaying
Hearts with hustle, don’t they see
The way she sculpts them out of shape?

After the last goodbye the yearning comes;
The miss-you-now that burns the eyes,
Nostalgia bites.
Is she, as soft as ferns, still sitting there
Like me? As mad as worms and wild as wheat
Just waiting for the world to find it’s feet.

ChePacifica
Member

since 2006-09-26

Posts 58
Ignore Alien Orders

1 posted 2006-10-05 07:01 PM

very nice and a great close !

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

2 posted 2006-10-06 12:52 PM

Grinch

"As mad as worms and wild as wheat"

vivid and original...and felt!

Copperbell
Senior Member

since 2003-11-08

Posts 956

3 posted 2006-10-07 02:18 AM

I like this

Triskaidekaphobia
Member

since 2003-02-05

Posts 251
In a state of disrepair...

4 posted 2006-10-07 02:36 AM

I really enjoyed this one...

I really like the language of this poem. Very original.

Keep on writing!

"The world won't end in darkness, it'll end in family fun
With Coca Cola clouds behind a Big Mac sun."

One God by The Beautiful South

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

5 posted 2006-10-07 04:56 PM

don’t they see
The way she sculpts them out of shape?

After the last goodbye the yearning comes;

so many good lines...I am interpreting my own way, which would sound spiteful to someone who doesn't know me...having watched a younger woman come between myself and my husband only to abandon him shortly after...leaving my life turned upside down..now in the process (finally) of uprighting itself...eventually to be without him. It will someday be his aftershock.
Enjoyed your discussion in CA also.
M

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.