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trutodaraiders
Senior Member

since 2006-12-02

Posts 820
CA

0 posted 2006-12-03 02:04 AM

The light beam through a crystal,
Has a path; you cannot find,
And your love was only visible,
In the corridors of your mind,
Each door... I longed to enter,
But you took away the key,
Then gave that key to others,
But you never gave to me,
Yet you said you loved me - sometimes,
But your love was always hid,
To my face you always cared,
But to my heart you never did,
For I showed you only tenderness,
I showed my love was true,
I bared my soul entirely,
But I guess you never knew,
And I hope we don't regret,
What deceit to us has cost,
And regret; that with our deaths,
So much of love... was lost.

Poetry is just the evidence of life.
If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. "
Leon Cohen~

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant

since 2000-01-29

Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia

1 posted 2006-12-03 02:06 AM

Bill.... I like your writing style it has such depth and emotion and truthfulness... and no, I'm not offering you any sugar here

Very much enjoyed!

Be well
Roniece

themute
Member

since 2006-05-08

Posts 469
Maryland

2 posted 2006-12-03 02:11 AM

I have had the same experience, but life can change its orbit; placing you into a new vantage point.

I am the two-toed wanderer

trutodaraiders
Senior Member

since 2006-12-02

Posts 820
CA

3 posted 2006-12-03 02:14 AM

Ahh no sugar *lol^ thank you for the compliment. Think I might have found a place where poetry is appreciated. Mute I agree with you wholeheartedly

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

4 posted 2006-12-03 09:20 PM

There is perfect cadence to this poem...the rhythm supports the theme very well.
The emotions in your words clearly evident.
Touching write.
TD

MsSouthernOrchid
Member

since 2003-07-12

Posts 192

5 posted 2006-12-04 12:04 PM

I agree with Roniece in that I like your style of writing. The emotion in your poem came through loud and clear. I enjoyed this one.

trutodaraiders
Senior Member

since 2006-12-02

Posts 820
CA

6 posted 2006-12-04 12:15 PM

Thank You for your kind words Ms Southern. It means a lot

Poetry is just the evidence of life.
If your life is burning well, poetry is just the ash. "
Leon Cohen~

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