Open Poetry #39 |
Mr. Omniscient's Quest |
Mr. Omniscient Member
since 2006-10-28
Posts 134 |
My gregarious, amiable, precocious, intimate displays Draw those towards me who seek my perspicacity. My illegibility towards your ignominious, unscrupulous ostentations greatly develops my confusion to your mentality… I must come forth and confess “Your system you work upon leaves me absentminded.” I’m grateful for my intellectual abilities to observe, analyze and rise upon your way of life, the roads you pervade through in a frenzy. While I use to twist and turn undergoing this journey in the midst pleading for the answer to the path I must forsake and the path I must follow. Perambulating slowly through this maze I’ve perceived that I must take the path I’m misled from, and take the cure to the source, to turn this “Dream Graveyard” we walk through daily, a haven, for those who dream to walk a land with intrepidity in their side pocket. |
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© Copyright 2006 Alexander Higginbottom - All Rights Reserved | |||
Edward Grim Senior Member
since 2005-12-18
Posts 1154Greenville, South Carolina |
No offence intended, but it's a little pretentious for me. Obviously you have a very extensive vocabulary but that doesn't mean you have to use every word you know in a single poem. The line breaks could use some work as well. I think you have potential and I would love to see a poem that is a little less ostentatious. Like I said, no offence, just trying to help. Cheers and welcome - Grim Yes it's me... |
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Mr. Omniscient Member
since 2006-10-28
Posts 134 |
Thanks for the input. I just used alot of my vocabulary so it could stick in my head. I seem to forget alot of the words that I learn after flicking through the dictionary. So I sort of used this as "Notes." |
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