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Open Poetry #39
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Crumpled Shoe Box
| Open Poetry #39 |
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Crumpled Shoe Box |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma 
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Crumpled Shoe Box With a raunchy rank whiskey stench He downed memories on the rocks The thing he'd always hugged tautly He placed in a crumpled shoe box Walked a lost lifetime of loving Across a barren field in time To the south end of the pasture Next to an ageing crippled pine Took his favorite reflection A long ago image that's morphed And dug a shallow eerie grave Under the twisted lonely dwarf He tore heartsick from his clutches Lowered the makeshift casket down Molded the earth into a mound Sealed the tomb with a gloomy frown Set a limestone as the headstone Then kneeled a solemn statuesque Mumbled a prayer without breath In the shadow of the grotesque Tried to tell this sad sad story As very best as best can blurt But words are a fleeting whisper In a buried coffin of hurt Omnia vincit amor |
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| © Copyright 2006 Pressie - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
Tried to tell this sad sad story As very best as best can blurt But words are a fleeting whisper In a buried coffin of hurt I loved all of this Pressie, and have to say that this ending is perfect. Indeed, sometimes we need to bury the hurt, so we can get on with the happy. Enjoyed your thoughts here today, Pressie.  seek the flame within yourself and let your soul be cleansed by the fire of love. Axel Ekenstierna |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
"sometimes we need to bury the hurt, so we can get on with the happy." Amen to that dear! Thank you Gentle Spirit for sharing your thoughts on my poem. Carpe Diem! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
a fine poem I agree with Gentle Spirit here |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Yep, sometimes that is what we must do to continue on....and sometimes that is a very difficult thing to do... Good story, liked it...thanx |
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wredgranny Member
since 2006-11-18
Posts 493Ky. USA |
Walked a lost lifetime of loving Across a barren field in time To the south end of the pasture Next to an ageing crippled pine Siyo Pressie I saw something here that was haunting beauty,reminded of my grandfather after the loss of my grandmother nearly sixty five years they share a path of love,laughter,and the deepest pain as they bury five of their ten children.Lost he walked for five years more,then kneeling at her place whisper I join you soon beloved!
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
"and sometimes that is a very difficult thing to do..." Your absolutely right...saying it doesn't make it so, but the "longest journey starts with.... Thanks Magnus for sharing time ... being kind. |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
Thanks ps and granny! This place is becoming an addiction. |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
I agree with the others Pressie often we need to bury the hurt and I love this poem embrace your addiction it only gets worse... or maybe I mean better |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
Thank you fair Lady for the kindness! Vis-a-vis embracing addiction: Isn’t there a law somewhere against having too much fun? |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Yes, 'tis a sad, sad story ~ and you told it very well, Monsieur Raconteur! Welcome to pipTalk! I hope you have more tales up your Poet sleeves. Giving you a warm, welcoming hug, Earth Angel |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
Earth Angel Yes, it is a personal story, and one that I literally did do.... Thank you for the very kind and eloquent welcome. Aquila non captat muscas |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Learning that it was a personal story makes your story all the more compelling and moving. God bless you, EA  |
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amberhues Member
since 2006-11-01
Posts 93 |
I agree with GS, and all of the others. Thank you for having the courage to share your story, this was wonderful. |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
amberhues, Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my poem! |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
I could tell by a comment you made on another's poem that I must experience one of your pieces. I am so glad I did. This is filled to the brim with emotion, nostalgia, and put-away pain. A wonderful solution, surely, to moving on. I especially like the phrases "hugged tautly" and "...blurt" Loved this, Pressie! VAS Whether on the shoal or on the shore, I'll seek the lighthouse evermore. |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
VAS, Thank you very much for those encouraging words! May the wind always be to your back: This is, unless your on a Harley. dum spiro, spero |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
This is a very heartfelt piece. Much enjoyed and placing this into my library. hugs, Chris by your pic, it seems that you might love to be "in the wind." My hubby has an 88 Softail - it's freedom! |
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sewasham Senior Member
since 2006-09-11
Posts 714Oklahoma, USA |
Nice job Pressie. Sometimes you just have to let things go. Take care and Have fun. Steve |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Pressie, I always read you but not always have the time to reply. Just wanted you to know how very much I enjoy your work. ~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~ Autumn, the year's last loveliest smile~ |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
Nightshade "by your pic, it seems that you might love to be "in the wind." My hubby has an 88 Softail - it's freedom! " Cool! Here I am on my 2000 Heritage Softail: /pip/Forum96/HTML/002145.html Nightshade, Steve, and Enchantress: Thank you fellow lovers of verse for the more than kind remarks! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Pressie....It's not easy to tell a poem like this without sounding...hmmm, sentimental's not the word...anyway...this is really good writing. You caught me in the emotional pull and took me with you easy. Thanks! |
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Pressie Member
since 2006-11-14
Posts 157Oklahoma |
"You caught me in the emotional pull and took me with you easy." Martie The write seemed to flow with the emotional current, I just tried my best to hang on to the oars. I've never been involved with an online community that I felt more at home in. Thanks Martie and all! |
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