Open Poetry #38 |
i finished your massacre |
elisalie16 Member
since 2006-07-12
Posts 118new jersey |
those colors from aumtumn filmstrips and the dark of their nights always blends into now and mixes my memories into a liquid too sour to swallow. those voices dont break into recievers anymore they slide and appear as requested even as we wish that theyd pierce just like before. i wanna spin myself down into the piles that used to bring me as low as you where i could meet you at eye level and slump over into mumbled feelings that left my mouth as my head met the tile. my minds gonna run away and leave me dragging behind it attatched by a string because these straight lines of wall in front of me dont hold the sights i need to see or the battles i need to fight in. the mirror gives the camera's shutter a more beautiful picture to print and the marks we're shown on paper issue higher grades than seen before but our pretty conversations give words that go back to when all was bad and everyone was good. your quiet sing-song twirls around my blue ribboned eyes and shines a light so white it blinds while lacing smiles across faces you thought were stoned and sad. youre the same as before with your single sentence heart beats-- im just like you would be if there hadnt been someone to pull you away from that cliff. [This message has been edited by elisalie16 (08-14-2006 12:16 AM).] |
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© Copyright 2006 Anne - All Rights Reserved | |||
Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
This is a very strong work from a strong writer who I hope is strong enough to pull away from the cliff unaided if need be. |
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elisalie16 Member
since 2006-07-12
Posts 118new jersey |
thanks local rebel, writing is it's own entire force away from the edge for me :-) |
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aziza Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy! |
I am glad that you were pulled from that cliff. This is wonderful work. aziza |
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elisalie16 Member
since 2006-07-12
Posts 118new jersey |
im glad you liked it, aziza! your compliments make me smile |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Anne~ 'your quiet sing-song twirls around my blue ribboned eyes and shines a light so white it blinds while lacing smiles across faces you thought were stoned and sad.' How rich with imagery are your thoughts here~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
as always, you grab the heartbeat quickly |
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elisalie16 Member
since 2006-07-12
Posts 118new jersey |
:-) |
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seraphin Senior Member
since 2000-09-24
Posts 1004Michigan |
A very powerful work. Well executed, and well felt. You have earned a rest, my friend. Sandra |
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