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Open Poetry #38
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| Open Poetry #38 |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest 
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walked out his door once upon a day down by the wharf sound of men working in the fog cries of lost birds dream within a dream beat of his heart became a threat lifted his hands to the hidden sun afraid to look upon its face pain hovered in the air inches above him time has come for giving he wrote in the air tucked the fog into his pocket and walked away |
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| © Copyright 2006 Kate - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
Mystery man I am not, but I've always enjoyed the mystery in the fog. |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
This is intriguing. There must be a story behind it. interested. martyjo |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
oh, another gem from your pen enjoyed this one immensely |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow |
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
You remind here, of the tale of the man and the sea... The age when we all, and often men; see the ebb of life, witness the pain of a stuttering heart; and go off to seek the glory of their dreams. Well done. This shined in my mind for long after I read it...over and over. TD  |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Kate~ Poetry within poetry ... 'he wrote in the air tucked the fog into his pocket and walked away' ... oh my how much I admire this passage of thought~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
Thank you Krawdad. Fog is very mysterious as are sea faring men. martyjo, I am sure there is a story behind this but if I knew it I have forgotten. Thank you Midnitesun. passing shadows, I appreciate your wow. Thank you so much TD. Marge, thank you for your kind reply! |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
lady ms, enjoyed your mind eye vcr here freeze frame well penned |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
he wrote in the air tucked the fog into his pocket perfect... M |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
marvelous |
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WindWalker Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 1218 |
Yes, I would have to agree, another gem from your pen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
As always you had me spellbound right past the end of your poem. However, this time it was with fear (up to the fourth-last line) that he was going to end his life. Am still breathing a sigh of relief that he didn't - and stunned at the perfection of the whole poem, but the mega-perfection of those last three lines. - Owl |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Perfect!! You have penned yet another keeper! Hugs~Nancy For it was not into my ear you whispered |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
Thank you Stranger. M, thank you so much. LeeJ, I appreciate your reply. Thanks for the kind words WindWalker. Thank you Diana. It was the line about the fog in his pocket that I saw in my mind’s eye. The rest came from there. Thank you Nancy. Hugs to you. |
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