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Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

0 posted 2006-01-30 07:16 PM

Jimmyray could build a fire.
I’d seen him start one in a downpour once,
outta damn near nothin’
and build it to roarin’
outta not much more.
Yep, Jimmyray could build a fire
and tonight, he had a doozy goin’.

There were half a dozen or so folks
movin’ and swayin’ around it,
though I never did hear what they were dancin’ to,
they seemed to be hearin’ it just fine.

I leaned back onto the stack of burnables
collecting a few feet away from the blankets
that Jimmyray slept on.

“Nick!  Lookat ‘er, Nick!  Lookat my far!
Ain’t she a beaut?  No moon t’night, thas why.
She’s beautee full.  All lit up from inside...”
his voice faded as his eyes fixed
on the flame he’d created.

My eyes fixed on a woman
I'd never seen before,
swaying and graceful, rhythmic alongside
a black night’s catlike melody,
enticing, though her lips made no sound
wrapping around
words I couldn’t make out
but later (too late) found to be

“Whether it fate
Or happenstance
Lay the rail
That brought you here
Let me lead
A merry dance
Without cry
Of coward’s prayer

Heat blood red
The tempered lance
In flame borne
From spark of thigh
Let me lead
A merry dance
To your death
And my delight”.

Yep, it would be quite some time
before Alanna’s words
and ways
were clear to me.
And even later that I’d learn
there are some voices
you only have to hear once
to know you never wanna hear them, again.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

1 posted 2006-01-30 07:38 PM

quote:
“Nick!  Lookat ‘er, Nick!  Lookat my far!
Ain’t she a beaut?  No moon t’night, thas why.
She’s beautee full.  All lit up from inside...”

And that is what this is...
all lit up,
from the inside.

It's good to have you back!

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

2 posted 2006-01-30 07:43 PM

I really enjoyed this scene, Duncan, and the Alanna that you painted.

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2006-01-30 08:25 PM

grinnin here, figgerin you 'n Alanna
been dancin 'round some mighty hot fires

wranx
Member Elite

since 2002-06-07

Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

4 posted 2006-01-30 08:57 PM

Hmmmm....

This "Alanna" thing seems to be catchin'

I've been enjoying the reads...all great!

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

5 posted 2006-01-30 09:03 PM

Duncan
I really enjoyed this read.

Dominique-Simone
Senior Member

since 2005-11-12

Posts 643

6 posted 2006-01-30 09:50 PM

This was an excellent poem with such an interesting story...

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

7 posted 2006-01-31 08:41 AM

This was very nice to wake up to.

love ya Duncan!

(Does this mean it's my turn? Or do we do the next dance together?)

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

8 posted 2006-01-31 09:06 AM

Love these Duncan...
I'll be watching for the next installment.
Hugs~Nancy

In the midst of winter,
I found there lives within me..
An invincible summer.

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

9 posted 2006-01-31 09:29 AM

Damn, I'll be back to this, have to go to school Duncan.

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

10 posted 2006-01-31 10:50 PM

My hands and heart are still warmed by that fire.

Nice write Duncan.

The Lady
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-12-26

Posts 7634
The Southwest

11 posted 2006-01-31 11:01 PM

"there are some voices
you only have to hear once
to know you never wanna hear them, again."

Oh! I love this. I love the story, I love the voice. Wow!

littlewing
Member Rara Avis

since 2003-03-02

Posts 9655
New York

12 posted 2006-02-02 01:38 AM

I think a dance is in order . . .

Damn, this was worth the wait.

though I never did hear what they were dancin’ to,
they seemed to be hearin’ it just fine.

See?

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA