Open Poetry #37 |
Beneath the woods with you |
Jack Straw Member
since 2006-03-02
Posts 70 |
Among the gaping willow trees And quiet natural themes I seek my refuge in this land To forever and ever be In the woods I calmly lay With content and introspection I’ve lost an interest in the life That’s claimed many a person Many a person who’s lost touch With Earth’s most valuable riches Instead they value cars and money Time to make new homes and niches And so I elope with the woods Singing soft melodies While others make their way to work I shall be dancing among trees. And when the diggers do come Looking for ancient clues I hope they’ll find my antique bones Beneath the woods with you. --- I haven't been writing much poetry as of late but I finally got this one off my soul and onto paper this morning. |
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© Copyright 2006 Jack Straw - All Rights Reserved | |||
ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Unearthed a bit of excellence! TD |
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Katerie Member
since 2006-01-27
Posts 92Central New York |
J'adore ça. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Very much enjoyed this piece. I'm so pleased you were able to get this one on paper. Hugs~Nancy ~ Trace my body with your words, |
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Jack Straw Member
since 2006-03-02
Posts 70 |
thanks for the compliments, I made some minor adjustments 6/7/06 6:34 pm. Do you like the title? I couldn't think of a fitting one so I just used the last line. But "beneath the woods with you" invokes what I was trying to get across in my eyes. Another title I considered was Content, but I threw it out because this poem doesn't merely deal with contentment. It's a reverence of nature, an appreciation for all of Earth's natural wonders and of course an invitation... anyway I'm getting on a tangent here. thanks for the warm words. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Reminds me of one of the home shows I was watching...where they built their home in the woods, with lots of windows, so they could enjoy the view and sounds of nature...James |
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Jack Straw Member
since 2006-03-02
Posts 70 |
In the woods I calmly lay With content and introspection I’ve lost an interest in the life That’s claimed many a person Many a person who’s lost touch With Earth’s most valuable riches Instead they value cars and money Time to make new homes and niches what do you think of those two stanzas? I have half a mind to reword it, half a mind. |
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Debo Member
since 2006-04-18
Posts 321Texas U.S.A. |
I must say I did enjoy this poem And When the diggers do come I hope the find my bones beneath The woods too... Debo |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I like it all every word |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
well, don't reword it when you only have half a mind lol, wait till it's a whole one all kidding aside, keep the them, write some more on it I enjoyed the read and the replies |
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Jack Straw Member
since 2006-03-02
Posts 70 |
thanks for all the encouraging words and midnite thank you for your perspective on stanzas 3 and 4. Did you mean add to the poem? Cause I had considered it but I like 5 stanzas in a poem. I think I'll probably just continue writing poems with nature themes for a little bit... |
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