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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

0 posted 2006-05-01 05:52 AM

lines
were zipping by
and this
universe
in fingertip
I raised my finger to my lips
and nodded to him:

"sssssshhhh"

lines
were zipping by
and I
took a finger's merriment
and made a valley's condescent
down
into the rubber grove...

"Do you see what I see here?"

He nodded
watching as he drove
lines
were zipping by

I said

"go slower--" gasping

"oh, go slow"

and the colors bled,
I said
from the condensation, wept
down the window dribblings
and that's
the best that I can sing
while I play the harpsichord:

I liked it best when they glow-ed
and flaming
like a red knight hoss
and I was cheating
with lip gloss
angling my dread.

I said:

"go slower"
whispered I to him

smiling at the worlds
we spent
there
within my fingertip
like bullets
full of rain

I said

"slower"

and he eased a bit...

like a red knight cross.

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

1 posted 2006-05-01 06:46 AM

wish I was smart enough to understand this one~~
although I do like taking it slow

hugs
M

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

2 posted 2006-05-01 06:52 AM

smiling...actually? the moral of the story is "don't think"

grin

I'd tell you that you did well, but wince? I never know when I'm ticking (revised due to "inappropriate content detected, and Ronnie? that's not even funny but annoying)someone off around here. *cackle* see what I mean?

canceled the glee

the place used to be fun

love you lady

and um, I am purty sure you owe ME a letter, um, right? sheeesh

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

3 posted 2006-05-01 07:04 AM

letter sent to yahoo~~~~

M

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean

since 1999-07-07

Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla

4 posted 2006-05-01 08:42 AM

serenity,
Love your abracadabras.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

5 posted 2006-05-01 08:58 AM

Lady you write magic!

*grins and hugs*

~ Trace my body with your words,
in doing so, you touch my heart ~

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

6 posted 2006-05-01 08:59 AM

I read that very first line and knew exactly what lines you were referring to...not that I got the rest..but sometimes I get the feeling I'm not supposed to. So I just enjoy the flow, the words, the you.

agree on that..it's like walking into my Mom's house..so clean you don't want to breathe.

love you Karen.

"too bad ignorance isn't painful"
~Unknown~

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

7 posted 2006-05-01 09:44 AM

I can top that.

But I won't.

(<--how'zzat for discretion?)

thanks for reading

Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

8 posted 2006-05-01 10:19 AM

Reading this instantly brought a smile to my face.

You have a way with words, lady.

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

9 posted 2006-05-01 10:55 AM

i love to read anything with your name on it

The Lady
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-12-26

Posts 7634
The Southwest

10 posted 2006-05-03 10:50 PM

"(<--how'zzat for discretion?)"

Discretion is the better part of valor
but who wants to be valorous?

Oh, I do love this one.

bubblesleave
Member

since 2006-03-04

Posts 197
Bloomington, IN

11 posted 2006-05-04 01:04 AM

Your poetry is so very intense.

makes the hair on my arms stand up!

makes my heart THUMP!!!

WoW, what more can I ask from a writer?

Hugs,

Bubbles

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

12 posted 2006-05-04 10:27 AM

this reads very well while listening to Bocelli...yanno? your a peach...New Orleans style and a poet I've surely missed...

well done, lady, well done!!!!

BROTHER JOHN
Member

since 2006-04-06

Posts 386

13 posted 2006-05-04 03:18 PM

"Ssssssshhh, I know clearly what you are saying! "Sssssshhh!"

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

14 posted 2006-05-04 05:03 PM

"and the colors bled,
I said
from the condensation, wept
down the window dribblings"

Ser, am grinning...and to make me grin today
took ahelluvalot. ~sigh~ life is such a beach somedays, but I wouldn't willingly trade it for the alternative.

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

15 posted 2006-05-04 11:52 PM

:danke':

majnu

Senior Member

since 2002-10-13

Posts 1088
SF Bay Area

16 posted 2006-05-15 12:33 PM

esoteric as always. well done.

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

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