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Open Poetry #37
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MERCURY
Member
since 2003-04-16
Posts 190
Ireland

0 posted 2006-04-10 09:55 AM



Listen to the breathless wind,
Howling and whistling through the pit stops of life.
Open your eyes to the war being waged all around.
Forces of good and evil have made their final stand.
The daylight shines less and less whilst the darkness glows in the neon night.
Too many are those seduced by this heartless beating of the night.
Evil spirits are plundering the weak and ego massaging the bad.
The relentless juggernaut of self infliction grips like the cold.
Only the warm hearted can survive this merciless onslaught.
My heart is crumbling through this justified paranoia.
Who of you can stand tall to this disease?
Woe to you who wallow on the brink of sanity.
It is only the pure that are left to be corrupted!


© Copyright 2006 MERCURY - All Rights Reserved
Androgynous
Member
since 2006-04-08
Posts 71

1 posted 2006-04-10 08:59 PM


"the darkness glows in the neon night."

Nice one! Simply loved that line, much enjoyed the read

Love

"How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!"

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
2 posted 2006-04-10 11:37 PM


an interesting write
and yes, I too enjoyed that neon line

EyeLashes
New Member
since 2006-04-11
Posts 3

3 posted 2006-04-11 12:17 PM


"Evil spirits are plundering the weak" great line! I'm new to the world of poetry, so I wish I could critique you, but the imagery I get from your poem is great. Hopefully someone as good as you could give me some pointers!
The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
4 posted 2006-04-11 01:09 AM




"Woe to you who wallow on the brink of sanity.
It is only the pure that are left to be corrupted!"

Wonderful lines in this poem MERCURY. I greatly enjoyed it.

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