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Open Poetry #37

Grief

Huan Yi
Member Ascendant

since 2004-10-12

Posts 6688
Waukegan

0 posted 2006-02-25 11:10 AM

The loss
What am I to do

The sky darkens
There are no stars

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

1 posted 2006-02-25 11:15 AM

John....The stars will come back, even though you feel the loss forever.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2006-02-25 11:26 AM

Exactly the feelings of grief.. well done!
Hugs~Nancy

~ Trace my body with your words,
in doing so, you touch my heart ~

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

3 posted 2006-02-25 11:26 AM

Grief
is a cloud
that blots
the stars

when the sun
returns
it will shine
like white gold

rain
makes it less

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

4 posted 2006-02-27 02:07 PM

One click... and I find 2 incredible poems. *S*

I've written what feels like reams on the subject... without capturing the essence you did in a few words... Excellent!

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-19

Posts 7392
Ohio

5 posted 2006-02-28 09:29 AM

starless and moonless
the night grieves
its shadows
the moourning overcomes

Christopher

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-02

Posts 8296
Purgatorial Incarceration

6 posted 2006-02-28 10:22 AM

while not typically a fan of exaggerated brevity in poetry, the simplicity of this piece sparked melancholy - i imagine such was the intent.

Drauntz
Member Elite

since 2007-03-16

Posts 2905
Los Angeles California

7 posted 2007-04-23 04:11 PM

every body will feel like this.

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