GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
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0
posted
2005-08-01
07:38 AM
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Laying on a picnic table, red paint chips under my fingernails.
I am trying to catch their conversation, anyone who passes. Eavesdropping because I have nothing else.
They don't know why I've been sick, or understand my left side cannot move, right now. Paralyzed on a picnic table...
They think I'm alseep, and laugh. There's nothing I can say.
~ Sorry everyone. Having a bit of writer's block... Bear with me!
Hupomeno.
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© Copyright
2005
GG
- All Rights Reserved
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Goldenrose
Member Elite
since 2003-05-30
Posts 3665
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1
posted
2005-08-01
08:00 AM
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A personal peek into the inner workings of your mind..enjoyed the read..thank you..
Goldenrose.Desire for nothing except desirelessness,hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes, want nothing and you will have everything.avatar Meher Baba.
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LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296
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2
posted
2005-08-01
08:09 AM
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then it's time to forget about it and go get a brand new manicure...hugs to you, I was so happy to see you had posted, have missed reading you.
Hugs Lee J.
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littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
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3
posted
2005-08-01
08:05 PM
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this made me feel like geez, Alyssa like living in a bubble where nobody really seems to quite understand your current frame of mind.
(That's my life, everyday sheesh)
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
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4
posted
2005-08-02
01:26 AM
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Goldenrose, my mind is a crazy thing! haha ...glad you enjoyed this, thank you for your reply
LeeJ, it was definitely the picnic table's red paint. These fingernails are anti-paint lol. Thanks so much for the comment, I've so missed being here to read and write and talk with all the wonderful poets. Hope all is well with you...
Sue, yep, that's pretty much it. I was at camp and didn't feel good so I layed on the picnic table and within a few minutes a hemiplegic migraine set in... which made me half paralyzed for about an hour. Couldn't speak well because of it so I just layed there listening to everyone around me. May be a more physical and drastic example, but I think the feeling is something we all have sometimes... of being the odd one out with no one even trying to understand. Thanks so much for your reply, good to see ya!
Always, Alyssa
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LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296
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5
posted
2005-08-02
07:05 AM
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Alyssa, wishing and hoping you have time to come back soon, as I've missed your poems a great deal...many thanks and hugs...and yes, everything is wonderful..thank you
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Patricia
Member Elite
since 2003-04-06
Posts 2160
Missouri
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6
posted
2005-08-02
08:21 AM
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I defintely know this...and you expressed it perfectly.
This is wonderful writing!
Pat
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nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
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7
posted
2005-08-02
09:28 AM
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hoping you are feeling well...missed you ..that's for sure I know what it's like to have something happen and no one realize it and you just have to wait it out hoping that you will be back to normal quickly.( as normal as one can be)
hugs M
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garysgirl
Member Laureate
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237
Florida, USA
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8
posted
2005-08-02
03:26 PM
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Hi Alyssa, It's good to see you. I've felt like this a lot of times, too.... and the way Maureen said. I try to just put on a happy face like I know everyone expects from me, and hope it all will soon pass over. Or I just get really quiet.
What gets me, though, is that instead of trying to understand when those feelings come, some people try to "fix" it for you by giving advice that would never work for you, or either try to get you to go to a psychiatrist or counselor of some sort. My problem would be that one of them probably wouldn't understand me either. LOL
Why can't people understand when we feel these ways that all we want is to be cared enough about to be listened to. Everybody needs a good listener sometimes who would still love and care for you unconditionally.
Sorry, my reply was so long. Looks like I'm relating to a lot of poetry today. LOL
Good to see you, Sweetie. Heart Hugs, Ethel
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
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9
posted
2005-08-05
05:39 AM
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LeeJ, Thanks you I hope I can continue to come back, too. Everything just seems to be crazy lately! I'm glad to hear things are well there! Take care...
M, the worst part, well, one of the worst parts lol, is that you just know people must think your crazy if they're not thinking that you need help or whatever. A lesson in humility, I suppose.Thanks for the comment, it so nice to see you again.
Always, AlyssaHupomeno.
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
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10
posted
2005-08-05
06:03 AM
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Ethel, one of the cool parts about having a physical problem, especially one that causes me to go temporarily paralyzed on one side, is that I get to see parts of people that normally I wouldn't be able to see. It's not all bad, and more often then not I find that people are interested, and want to help, but they're afraid and don't know what to do. So they scramble for words or they ignore it all together. I think it's the same with what you're talking about. They don't know what to do, either. and I think how much we try to hide or defend our being sad about something makes it even worse. You wouldn't believe some of the shrink stories I have lol! Don't go to one anymore, and never found a good one, but I do think it's a worthwhile thing. I enjoyed your long response! It was good seeing ya here... hope all is well with you!
Always, AlyssaHupomeno.
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Larry C
Member Patricius
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286
United States
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11
posted
2005-10-18
08:57 PM
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Alyssa, Come here you...
I love it that you can share so plainly here. I hate it that it happens to you at all. And most of all, you know we care. If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again.
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Suetang
Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia
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12
posted
2005-10-18
11:00 PM
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Alyssa
You always paint such wonderful and very real pictures with your words. It is so nice to read you again and I send you my warmest regards. I hope that life is treating you kindly.
Take care........SueI am in motion I am blue Love is an ocean I'm anchored in you - Shawn Mullins
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iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
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13
posted
2005-10-19
04:25 AM
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Oh, Alyssa....this is so sad....I hope you are not in serious pain and you've gotten better since you wrote the poem. I was so glad to see you name here tonight. Haven't seen you for awhile....but then, again, I'm not around all the time either. Wishing you a good today, sweet one. The poem captivated me and packs a punch. ....jo
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
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14
posted
2005-10-26
11:37 PM
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Larry, you come here... thank you for pulling this back up and leaving me a note with your care. It's much appreciated. Only 17 days until the move and I'm excited and scared spitless. A lot of things have really worked out, a lot haven't... but I'm really thankful for what has. And really thankful that even when I'm not around, I still have people who care Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Always, AlyssaHupomeno.
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
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15
posted
2005-10-26
11:46 PM
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Sue, You always offer so many compliments and well wishes, thank you for that . And yep, life is going okay. I hope that it is going well for you, it's great to hear from you.
jo, nope I haven't been around lately, and I've missed reading you! No worries, the good news is I'm not feeling half bad tonight, well, maybe half, but the rest of me is feeling unusually well! lol ...I even found a great doctor so no reason to be sad. It's great to hear from you, thanks so much for stopping by.
Always, AlyssaHupomeno.
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