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OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa

0 posted 2005-12-16 02:19 PM


Jacaranda Word-Wanderings
14 December 2005

In spite of your secret, child-sharp darts
all those jacaranda blossoms ago,
and later,
witnessing my solitary childhood
eminently positioned
around your mocking home,
taunting, stabbing,
I would never have envisioned
then,
that even you,
and your mother from her grave,
could
would
ask me
to help you
take away
yet another
chink of my birthright
and the little
that was light.


- Owl


© Copyright 2005 Diana van den Berg - All Rights Reserved
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
1 posted 2005-12-16 02:36 PM


Owl....Such a beautiful tree, the Jacaranda...but the barbs it holds do hurt if touched.  I like the way you related your poem's emotive content to the tree.  well done!  
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
2 posted 2005-12-16 05:23 PM


I have never seen such a tree but why am I getting this as your father?
Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
3 posted 2005-12-16 06:48 PM


nice jac stab! barbed perfectly  

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
4 posted 2005-12-17 01:52 AM


Thank you Martie, littlewing and Midnite Sun.  

You were close, littlewing.  The poem wasn't to my absent and dis-interested father, but to my cousin.  Jacaranda trees don't have barbs, but my cousin did and she still does.  Where there is a rich, old person near their deathbed, there she will be - and hey presto!  After their death, she inherits.  It's not about the money or the monetary value (even though the money wasn't my mother's to give away - my father had left it for me in the form of shares for my mother to look after and give to me when I turned 21, but she didn't), it's about the exclusion and the turning of my family against me (but that was mainly my mother's fault) and my invisibility in their eyes.

The jacaranda tree was in my cousin's garden in their home in Dundee, a small town in Northern KwaZulu-Natal where my mother and I used to visit for 2 weeks a year for about 4 years.  My mother and my cousin's father were sister and brother.  There was also a swing and my mother and I loved to swing - we'd take it in turns - and admire the huge jacaranda tree and its beautiful purple blossoms and the carpet of them on the lawn under the tree.  I just used the tree in that one line as a timeline for my cousin (although she will never get to read this poem).  This was over 40 years ago.

When I was a pre-teen and a teenager, my mother and I used to go to Scottish Country Dancing together - not the Highland Fling and such - that is Highland Dancing - Scottish Country Dancing is done in teams of 8 - either 4 men and 4 women - or 8 women.  For exhibitions and competitions, the men wear kilts and the women wear white dresses with a tartan sash pinned together with a cairngorm - which is a circular metal brooch with a central sunshine-coloured, translucent semi-precious stone.  My mother had one and so did I.  They were not expensive items, but they have sentimental value for me as they remind me of the times when my mother and I got along together.  

This particular poem was about a cairngorm.  My cousin phoned me to get my daughter's physical address (in Australia).  My cousin's mother died a few months ago and she wanted my daughter to have it.  It may be my mother's one (it may even be mine - or it could possibly be both that my cousin wanted to send).  I was hurt that she (and her mother before her death) could give away something of no monetary value (but of sentimental value to me) to my daughter who didn't know my mother as she was too young when my mother died - and that they could use me to do so.  The postage will probably cost a lot more than the item.

Sorry about this ranting.  I have never done this about my family on a poetry forum before - trying to protect them - but then, it suddenly struck me - why?  - I don't think they would care whether I protected them or not.

Besides, it must be me, not them, otherwise why would they all reject me?  Sorry - that is really self-pity now.  Snap out of it, Owl - snapped out of now - but I am still going to post this reply.

- Owl

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
5 posted 2005-12-17 03:19 PM


OwlSA, Undestanding and here to say you are in the right place. So many understaning souls here.You are a good writer and they will appreciate you for what you write and who you are. Welcome home. martyjo.



HopeS
Member Elite
since 2000-12-22
Posts 4596
Perth Western Australia
6 posted 2005-12-17 11:01 PM


So glad you could vent through your words , by the way I lived in a house years ago with a huge Jacaranda Tree , they are so beautiful in blossom

Hope

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
7 posted 2005-12-18 05:36 AM


Thank you so very much latearrival and HopeS.  It is good to feel so understood and welcome, latearrival.  Glad you will know exactly what the tree looked like.  This one was also huge.

- Owl

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
8 posted 2005-12-18 06:50 PM


enjoy your style of interweaving nature and
your own journey thorough..welcome to pips
dear poet OwlSA

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
9 posted 2005-12-18 06:56 PM


The light in your birthright cannot be stolen. Even those who try to take, get touched my the light themselves ~ and will start glowing with little bits of your light!

Your gift just keeps on giving and giving!


Ea

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655
New York
10 posted 2005-12-19 06:17 AM


I love that you tell stories . . . and thank you for your reply.  
ice
Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404
Pennsylvania
11 posted 2005-12-19 08:16 AM


Image hosted by Photobucket.com

The poem is hauntingly beautiful,
It is what lies on the earth in the form of blossoms...The tree cannot retrieve what it has lost...
But this poet has continued to flower, I am glad she has...

enjoyed
______  _______ice

   ><>

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

12 posted 2005-12-19 01:33 PM


I do feel very much in tune with you OWL.

I have seen this in someone I loved, even when I didn't want to see it, and it saddened me so much.

Y'see? I very much want to remain an idealist. sigh. It gets harder every year.


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