Open Poetry #36 |
"N" and "Of Daze" (Heh 2 4 the price of 1) |
Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
-This is about that guy... the one I like now... I decided to name it the first letter of his name. "N" I'll never ask my friend Of the words you cannot place For it is time we live by and what's between us is space No obsticals around us But anxioty and fear Which infect our dreams and hearts And keeps us from being near -Um this was when I was sick Back in mid october to late november 2004 "Of Daze" So lonely So lonely I fealt Weak in spirit and body Couldn't write Couldn't write or type My body could only cry I wanted wanted to be held I was a woman-child Such is this Such to be humbled Laying there weak and helpless To be dazed Dazed yet unaware Because the heart is stronger Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic The dictionary never lies.... I am magical (; [This message has been edited by Juju (07-08-2005 10:35 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2005 Juju - All Rights Reserved | |||
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
"I wanted wanted to be held I was a woman-child" oh, but this one rings some bells enjoyed this moment of sharing your heart |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Juju...m'dear... in response to your critique? There is no reason you cannot spell...and while yes, while personally you may have a spelling problem? Write out your poems in Word or another program that has a spell check feature, use it, and you know what? The misspelling of your poems will not, then, be little facts that turn people off from responding to your poems. Sometimes misspelling can be the whole reason why some folks do not respond to a good poem! M'dear...spelling does count. So? I am pointing it out, just as your critique indicates. But? With As for the poem? I know what "sick" is - as you do - and it's not a fun place to be. You wrote the right of this, very well, indeed! |
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Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
Woops. Yeah I thopught I DID BUT i GUES i DIDN'T. Lol. OH well I fixed it.(; Juju - 1.) a magic charm or fetish 2.)Magic 3.)A taboo connected woth the use of magic |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
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