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Open Poetry #35
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ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state

0 posted 2005-03-12 12:47 PM


The male fury
the female hearth
one attracts the other
admiration becomes love
under themes of 'does he like'
under plots of 'does she mind'


female coyness
male brawn
one attracts the other
another separates
love becomes dislike
under themes of 'why didn't she'
under subplots of 'how could he'


If creatures meet
fall apart
meet again
admiration falls into deeper accords
where love disintegrates
under the themes of 'who did what, when'
better to stave off compromise
stay single then.



© Copyright 2005 Martin Dansky - All Rights Reserved
Marshalzu
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681
Lurking
1 posted 2005-03-12 07:24 AM


Enjoyed

Andrew

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2005-03-12 09:50 AM


It's called "change" and "unconditional acceptance"...and other things, in order to stave off the singleness...

Very good, Martin.  Thank you for this one.

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
3 posted 2005-03-12 12:54 PM


A point of view
nicely put
across

regards
sudhir

ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
4 posted 2005-03-12 04:28 PM


it's the unconditional is what people face up to, when they find we're all conditioned, more or less


passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
5 posted 2005-03-12 07:56 PM


I should send this one to my brother, and would if we were speaking. He just ran another woman out of his life again, and this one he was planning on marrying.


ecrivan
Member Elite
since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
6 posted 2005-03-14 12:58 PM


sounds like poor planning


majnu
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Senior Member
since 2002-10-13
Posts 1088
SF Bay Area
7 posted 2005-04-01 12:28 PM


a bit didactic but the couplets (yes i'll call them that) and the last stanza were great.

in anycase, you got the hamster in my head running again.

cheers

-majnu
--------------------------------------
Timid thoughts be not afraid. I am a Poet.

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
8 posted 2005-04-01 04:24 PM


enjoyed
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