»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #35
»
Fever---an emulation of a Silverstein poem, "SICK"
| Open Poetry #35 |
|
Fever---an emulation of a Silverstein poem, "SICK" |
|
|
VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
Fever “I cannot go to work today,” said Gerald McBean Carroway “I have a fever and some sores; my feet cannot get through doors. There’s spots all inside my throat; I think I cannot stay afloat. My head is scarlet, brow to chin; there in my ear’s a horrid din. Some say it’s spring or cabin kind, I think I’ll lose my friggin’ mind. My legs are lumpy; my toes are blue; I cannot see from me to you. My throat is taut; I need some liquor I’m in de grip o’ bo’constrictor. I really cannot work today please ask my friends if they will pray. For nothin’ more than miracles will stop these roaring decibals. What’s that you say? A raise you say? No way! You’ll pay, $5 more for ev’ry day? Well scab me over and wipe my tears let’s celebrate with 30 beers; not ev’ry day’s got miracles; I tell you true, that ain’t no bull! ©February 26, 2005 Below, the poem I was emulating: SICK by Shel Silverstein “I cannot go to school today,” Said little Peggy Ann McKay. “I have the measles and the mumps, A gash, a rash and purple bumps. My mouth is wet, my throat is dry, I’m going blind in my right eye. My tonsils are as big as rocks, I’ve counted sixteen chicken pox And there’s one more–that’s seventeen, And don’t you think my face looks green? My leg is hurt, my eyes are blue– It might be instamatic flu, I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke, I’m sure that my left leg is broke– My hip hurts when I move my chin, My belly button’s caving in, My back is wrenched, my ankle’s sprained, My ‘pendix pains each time it rains. My nose is cold, my toes are numb, I have a sliver in my thumb, My neck is stiff, my spine is weak, I hardly whisper when I speak. My tongue is filling up my mouth, I think my hair is falling out. My elbow’s bent, my spine ain’t straight, My temperature is one-o-eight. My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear. There is a hole inside my ear. I have a hangnail, and my heart is–what? What’s that? What’s that you say? You say today is . . . Saturday? G’bye, I’m going out to play!” Whether on the shoal or on the shore, |
||
| © Copyright 2005 Virginia Salter - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
bbent Senior Member
since 2001-01-07
Posts 521Alaska |
honestly i think i liked your's better.it's interesting that you emulated a song writer,i always thought it rather odd that alot of poets consider them a different lot..anyway a gutsy,ruff and tumble write,i enjoyed. Live like it's your last day... |
||
Interloper
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369Deep in the heart |
Well done, Virginia! Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write. |
||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
that's adorable! I've always loved Shel, since I was a child when I first read The Giving Tree |
||
*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
I had always loved that poem by Shel Silverstein, but I think I like yours better!  ~Alli~ *AIM = Alli4000* Journal! |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
