Open Poetry #35 |
God Forbid |
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
God Forbid I saw the face of God forbid It had a tear drop on its lid Closed yet staring open space Covered in a shawl of lace In its hand a wilted rose A stem of thorns where it arose Underneath an eyelid door Where odors of its spirit store? It held me in a frozen stance Pierced me through as if a lance Brought my heart to rage in beat Fired up my blood in heat Until a tear began to flow Empathetic in it’s know Sliding down my cheek in run Like a river in the sun To this day I feel this wend And fear I will until my end |
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© Copyright 2005 Seymour Tabin - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
This needs a goose-bump alert. The chills I felt upon the read... Thank you for this, Sy... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I saw the face of God forbid It had a tear drop on its lid Closed yet staring open space Covered in a shawl of lace In its hand a wilted rose A stem of thorns where it arose Underneath an eyelid door Where odors of its spirit store? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Until a tear began to flow Empathetic in it’s know Sliding down my cheek in run Like a river in the sun ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ oh man...you are soooooooo coooooool!!!!!! This poem rocks!! I dont know which leaves me more giddy... the imagery or the symbolism!! Mother Nature is kissing you for the metaphors in this gem of rhymes divine... This write is like a box of chocolates... so many delights to pick out, the first verse's intend is poetic gold...and what a hook for an opening...WOW.... and this line... Underneath an eyelid door Ever clever... you are!! and this one ... Like a river in the sun you know Im loving that image...as always you amaze me with how much imagery you can create in the readers mind with just one single line... I would need 3 verses to try and create that image...but you just kissed a few words with cadence and there it is. Yep...you rock...and its rolls me. *L* *ww* |
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MARK V SHELDON Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015In a corporeal internship... |
This puts a new slant on "the all-seeing eye"... I wonder if it actually could feel sympathy...? Interesting ponder... -MVS You CAN make a difference, but first you should learn how: http://educate-yourself.org/intro.shtml |
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inot2B Member Elite
since 2000-09-18
Posts 2205Arkansas |
The all knowing The all seeing Thru your eyes You are the BEST! |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Sy darling man, OH MY this is exquisite, how delightful to see your words again. Actually its not that I see them I feel them, here in the depths of my being, truly one of those I shall treasure from your ever brilliant pen. Miss me did you darling man? No I suppose not, but I certainly missed you, and your divine words of pure poetic wisdom I'll be back soon, I hope, to see some more, as always Mushy xx xx Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
I do believe that you be one who truly has seen the Face of God! ~ because It is reflected in your own... Love & God's Light, EA |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Sunshine YOU ALWAYS MAKE MY DAY JM, Your words are Angel cake to me and I just love angel cake. WW MARK, Oh I think it can. inot2B, Enjoyed your eply, thank you. Marsha Nice to hear from you again, I hope all is well. Earth Angel Only an Angel would say that. Big hugs JM, I am over whelmed, love ya. Stinky |
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SimplyGold Senior Member
since 2002-07-10
Posts 1453 |
Speechless. Thank you. SG |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
I'm speechless, too! Appauding this one, Sy! ....jo |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
My spirit will rise |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
just awesome |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
SimplyGold A Gold reply, thank you. iliana MGROVES too. MGROVES Awesome is a lovely flower. |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I'd ask for a chill bump alert, too... except envy for your amazing images combats the shivers they conjure. *S* Excellent write! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
passing A strong reply, thank you. suthern You are just a dear. |
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Startime55 Member Elite
since 2003-04-05
Posts 2148Alberta, Canada |
WOW!!!How could it not touch the soul to read such powerful words as these...Stunning words to stay deep inside....*big hugs* |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Startime55, A very kind reply, thank you. |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Seymour...Every word totally captured what life's all about. "YOU ARE THE MAN"...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Paul, I can only say, thank you my friend. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice...James |
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