Tears of Wax (senryu) - pipTalk Forums

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Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

0 posted 2005-02-22 01:45 PM

burning candle weeps
as romance wanes from deceit
flickering flame dies

.
.

Chris Barker
~~~~~~

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

1 posted 2005-02-22 01:57 PM

'as romance wanes from deceit'

Yup, you said it perfectly Chrissy....

perfectly.

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

2 posted 2005-02-22 01:59 PM

candles do weep dont they? sighhhh

hugsssss

~~*~~
I'm Standing on a bridge
I'm waitin in the dark
I thought that you'd be here by now
Theres nothing but the rain
~~**~~

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

3 posted 2005-02-22 02:02 PM

Donna & Lauren, thankyou dear ladies.

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

4 posted 2005-02-22 02:05 PM

Beautiful as ever, both poet and poem.
So good to see you posting again, Chris.

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

5 posted 2005-02-22 02:46 PM

Wow! Few words - heavy stuff -

Susan

If I wander far enough, long enough, will I finally know . . .

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

6 posted 2005-02-22 03:10 PM

How very lovely! *S*

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

7 posted 2005-02-22 03:21 PM

Good one Chris...
Love, hugs and miss ya, Teed.

In the midst of winter,
I found there lives within me..
an invincible summer.

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

8 posted 2005-02-22 03:25 PM

Thankyou sweet lady poets!!

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-29

Posts 7115
South Africa

9 posted 2005-02-22 03:34 PM

"romance wanes from deceit" - yes, well said!

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

10 posted 2005-02-22 04:34 PM

Honeybunch - thankyou for taking the time to read and comment. hugs!

JL
Member Ascendant

since 2004-04-01

Posts 6128
Texas, USA

11 posted 2005-02-22 04:47 PM

Excellent!!
Perfect, perfect!!

Enjoyed the lesson.

JL

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

12 posted 2005-02-22 04:51 PM

Chris, your words were beautiful, yet poignant. Lovely, yet sad...

May all your candles burn brightly.

Linda

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

13 posted 2005-02-22 08:40 PM

JL & Linda - hugs and many thanks!

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

14 posted 2005-02-22 09:38 PM

Kiddo, you nailed this one really well.
Excellent description. Could not have done
better myself.

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

15 posted 2005-02-22 09:53 PM

Thanks & Hugs, Magnus me friend !

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

16 posted 2005-02-23 04:32 AM

yes, candles weep indeed

latearrival
Member Ascendant

since 2003-03-21

Posts 5499
Florida

17 posted 2005-02-23 05:16 AM

nightshade: Yes, "tears of wax" ~ your write brings back sweet memories. Sometime during my third year of widowhood, friends and one of my daughters suggested I start to live my life. Daughter made an appointment to have my hair cut and colored. Friends set up a "date". As I dressed that evening I lit a candle and placed it upon a special plate that held close ties to my husband. When I went to blow it out, I saw the melted wax seemed to form tears on the plate. I read it through tears of my own to say, "It is okay,I am sad but you must go on". It was a very strange feeling of release not permission but a loving gift to me from him. . best marty

INclan
Senior Member

since 1999-07-20

Posts 1024
Indiana, USA

18 posted 2005-02-23 09:52 AM

Thank you, Nightshade.

INclan

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

19 posted 2005-02-23 09:53 AM

Dixie - hugs and thanks for reading!!

Marty - how sweet of you to share that warm memory with all of us. Thankyou so much.

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

20 posted 2005-02-23 09:54 AM

INclan - You're welcome & many thanks to you!

Interloper

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-06

Posts 8369
Deep in the heart

21 posted 2005-02-23 12:32 PM

Chris writes senryu
my most favored form of verse
and does it so well

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

22 posted 2005-02-23 01:15 PM

Gleeeeeeeeeee !!

Hello Interloper!! Oh, I needed to smile this afternoon, and you were the man to bring one on! I am so glad that you are back. Thankyou & Welcome home hugs!!

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

23 posted 2005-02-23 01:32 PM

Lost in yellow flame
Red wax tears burning my skin
The candle burns down

I might forget passion’s name,
But never its lingering sound.

Gloom

Nightshade

Member Patricius

since 2001-08-31

Posts 13962
just out of reach

24 posted 2005-02-23 03:07 PM

Oh, Gloom, that's beautiful...thankyou so much!

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