unresolved between a thai lad and I

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Open Poetry #35

unresolved between a thai lad and I

kaile

Member Ascendant

since 2000-02-06

Posts 5146
singapore

0 posted 2005-05-06 02:32 PM

after I declined his offer
of whisky for the umpteenth time,
two sincere souls fell into oblivion,
not quite knowing how to connect

we seemed to gaze at
the nonchalant smoke
of his cigarette
trailing off
into the pitch-dark night

does his culture believe
in companionable silence?

the fireflies shone extra hard,
as if challenging me
to decipher their answer

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2005-05-06 07:17 PM

I've had a few nights like this

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

2 posted 2005-05-07 12:07 PM

Enjoyed...James

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

3 posted 2005-05-07 12:20 PM

even when you see them from a different perspective, those fireflies light up with the same message

namaste

how are you these days my friend?

Copperbell
Senior Member

since 2003-11-08

Posts 956

4 posted 2005-05-07 12:31 PM

I love this!

Startime55
Member Elite

since 2003-04-05

Posts 2148
Alberta, Canada

5 posted 2005-05-07 12:58 PM

Well done...you take your reader with you to ask the same questions...A wonderful poem...I really enjoyed it...

Mon Cherie

Senior Member

since 2001-10-31

Posts 922
Land of Never-ending Summers

6 posted 2005-06-01 12:44 PM

Wow! This is really interesting!! I would have taken the whisky if I were you. Juz can't stand those prolonged moments of silence... And thank goodness for those fireflies, else there'd really be nothing entertaining to do huh?

But I'm a little uncomfortable with your use of the word "oblivion". It means a "state of being disregarded or forgotten". Do you think it's possible to be forgotten in that moment of time? I would think the silence that stretch between you will make it more obvious, that you're probably searching for a topic?? :P

_,,,^.^,,,_
Florence

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

7 posted 2005-06-01 08:41 AM

"companionable silence" ~ at times, there truly are no need for words.

You vividly painted that moment in time.

Good to read your thoughts again, Kaile!

Sending you a big, warm hug,
Linda

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