Open Poetry #34 |
The Hollow of Burn--(Littlewing & Greeneyes) |
Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
A slow burn ignited begins its ascent as I dangle, limp and sullied upon my own crucifix where I have tried to capture this emotion, a dull ache, nesting making its final resting place, in the hollow of my chest But, I fail. My eyes, shrouded yet wide open, stare into profoundness and the only sign of life, is a single tear routing its course down a disintegrating highway lingering there these days pressing cool curves underneath- holding on loosely- - feeling pine kiss thirsty lips searching in lines and spraying light for the cut of shadows this naked landscape leaves me chilled to the bone it is still daytime: when soft rains begin to fall each drop from this sky, barren long before I, mingle with the brine now angered and crusted settled upon my cheeks. Caked with failure It is difficult to squint into this blindness, such expanse a landscape, this life, and find myself split between desperation and madness I force my lips to part, to drink of myself only to expel my tongue, singed by unforgiving desert winds I have no choice but to tilt my chin to the clouds, mouth wide open, screaming to pray for my release. Outspoken lyrics in a mirror of echoes, mocking the cool pulse as stones sleep in stolen dreams darkening all words pressing palms to the twilight of heaven We live in space, through stages in pause and thought reflecting slow burn harvested by time ~~*~~ Read between the lines look deep into each word and you will understand the depth of my soul (GE) ~~**~~ |
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© Copyright 2004 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved | |||
babygirlwlove Senior Member
since 2004-10-10
Posts 1180New York City |
"between desperation and madness I force my lips to part, to drink of myself only to expel my tongue, singed by unforgiving desert winds" what a release....excellent collab you two... **babygirL** **Intoxicant to the SouL** |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
OMG!! This is fantastic! I do hope you two will duet again and soon!! ~Sending Hugs to you Both, Nancy~ ~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~ |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh gawwwwwwwwwwwwwwd. Ladies....shakin my head... tis not just the beauty of this that pulled me in, but the depths found within your words mingled... speechless except a quiet whisper of "more.....please".... The greatest beauty on earth, is |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Sue... thank you for allowing me to touch the inner depth.... ~~*~~ |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
I don't know who brought who into this dark reverie, or if you found yourselves there together. I can only say that there is a "oneness" about this write that is, well, uncanny. And a depth that belies its spare frame. Praise, would not be enough |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
"as stones sleep in stolen dreams darkening all words pressing palms to the twilight of heaven We live in space, through stages in pause and thought reflecting slow burn harvested by time " Awesome ladies!!! ....very well written, and i look foward to more |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
babyg, Nancy, Ed, Donna and Dawn . . . thank you so very much for reading, your replies are humbling and we found each other along this path for sure and Lauren? Thank YOU for bringing it home. Thanks guys, this was amazing to write with Lauren. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
A fantabulous duet, Lauren, Sue...well done both of you. I tried to pick out who wrote what but to no avail. Excellent! Maree and I am haunted |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
bravo ladies.. bravo... as usual..I'm left speechless.. when I read the likes of you two |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
A duet where one pen cannot be distinquished from the other. An excellent read and pairing. |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Maree, Ron and Mark, thank you so much . . . it was ALL Lauren who made seem seamless *smile* Thanks guys. |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
I needed this poem. I mean, needed it... just now. I'm so glad I found it. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
enjoyed |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
Sue and Lauren, I am so glad that this was brought back up.....otherwise, I may have missed reading it. This is beyond words, it's so beautiful. But, when I saw two of my favorite friends names together, I knew it would be awesome. Is there more? If so, point me to them. Okay? Heart hugs to you both Hugs, Ethel |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
You guys need to do another duet!!! ~Alli~ *:.AIM = Alli4000.:* |
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Ericc Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178 |
Two of my favorites. Joined in an awesome write! Eric |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
You had me at the title - great craftladyship Sure can't figure out who is who, now that's good! |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Lauren and Sue A profound melding of poetic talent...I'm so glad I didn't miss it! |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
This is a desperate, beautiful plea. You two sing as though you are one. Wonderful! I love it. Always, Alyssa He was a man of sorrows |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
OMG you guys are so good to us! Thanks for bringing it back up and thank you so much for liking it. (was all Lauren) |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Very refined poetry, girls. You soar. Love, Margherita |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
enjoying this slow burning reflection of two hearts singing in beautiful harmony |
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