Open Poetry #34 |
Memories |
RedStoneEB Senior Member
since 2003-06-08
Posts 772uk |
Memories haunt the waking hours of summer’s morn painting images of sorrow into the beauty given frame the mirror only shows you what you want to see reflecting ghosts that once had lifes and families Each step taken aimed towards death on the rivers of hell there my body shall sink roasted on the flames down below and devils grant feast upon my fresh stripping me of goodness leaving me disfigured and in regret evil portrayed within Ones that died before rest their head upon my mind thumping the pillow causing me pain and grief inside death comforting my side stained with sickening blood waiting for permission to drain me dry and gain a new tattoo Evil spirits shall laugh at this spirit within the human suit but all I see is angels beating their wings whispering forgiveness pulled against the tide of evil sins swallowing the good and when the time my eyes close and open never again one question lingers in mind did I lose to the memories? |
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© Copyright 2004 Lee Hepworth - All Rights Reserved | |||
Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan |
"one question lingers in mind did I lose to the memories?" This needs to be clearer. John |
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DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
The question is the aim as far as I am concerned. Is it that you wrote for effect, or that you wrote for reject. Words we write at times often seem like a basement tape. Talent is there, words are there, aim is missing. Can I politely ask whether some addition was present. Dave |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
but all I see is angels beating their wings whispering forgiveness When the light is present, as it is in these lines, all the rest fades. Love, Margherita |
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