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Open Poetry #34
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Do not disturb
| Open Poetry #34 |
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Do not disturb |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn 
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Outside of the hotel On the other side of the plate glass And heavy curtain Was a city Creaking and groaning along, as cities do But, they were inside, insular And couldn’t hear the concrete crumbling Or the steel, protesting gravity The lovemaking had begun hours before Days, really There, he was Adam and she, Eve And, there was no one to tell them When the lovemaking should end Or, when it should begin again But she had somewhere to be now Home, or at school He didn’t recall Only that it was somewhere else A place he couldn’t be She had reclaimed her clothing From the wet tangle of poetry They had written into the sheets And as he watched the girl in the mirror Dressing, smoothing, Recivilizing herself He rose up behind her Whispering his fatuities into her neck Grasped the bell of her hips And decided the city outside Could wait for her a while longer Under the weight of its pigeons |
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| © Copyright 2004 E.F.Rose - All Rights Reserved | |||
Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
BRAVO!! damn, what a write keeper, keeper |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
I will never again, consider pigeons a nuisance.  oh you make a woman know the moment. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
She had reclaimed her clothing From the wet tangle of poetry They had written into the sheets ================================ yes..BRAVO...and damn I wish I had wrote that verse!! Me thinks you can forget the bowling & decoupage you are a poet! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
SEN? we did it again... lmao  |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
gleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee somethings? I don't WANT to change. (make room for a yeti here) |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
*squish* LMAO |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Okay. so you make women know the moment. *laughing* |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
quite a yeti sandwich you seen to have made here ladies... Ed... love the poem.. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"He rose up behind her Whispering his fatuities into her neck Grasped the bell of her hips" and that is all it takes... the want.. *sigh* very, very nice Ed. "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
damn.... SIGH.... |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"He rose up behind her Whispering his fatuities into her neck Grasped the bell of her hips And decided the city outside Could wait for her a while longer Under the weight of its pigeons" Ooooh myyyy...this is...this is poetry at it's finest. Yes..that moment...ooooh, damn. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Let me add the fixin's to the sandwich, girls... He is both indeed a poet, and quite the  |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
wranx Well you got the girls vote. Well done |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Oh god, sighhhh, this one just makes my insides scream with so much want..smile, masterful Bro i'm keeping it. mxx into this night i wonder, it's morning that i dread, another day of knowing of, the path i fear to tread. |
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*Alli4000*
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188The World of Poetry |
I enjoyed this!  ~Alli~ Happy Holidays! |
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DavePage Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917 |
Like it. I agreed with Alli's words but in ectoplasm not physical. dave |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
smiling at "Do not disturb"... Even a hotel room can truly transform into the most paradisiac island when there is such attunement. Very beautiful! Love, Margherita |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Oh... you gift me such memories... or are they wishes? *G* Either way... applauding serves two purposes... showing appreciation... and fanning a heated face! *G* Excellent... YES! *S* |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
absolutely excellent - loved the feel and flow of this - the passion SusanEvery action generates a force that returns to us in like kind . . . let us choose compassion and love |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Ah, the great stuff I miss by letting life push me away from PIP..... ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
gasping at this, been so little ive read lately...so glad to find you today |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
*smiling* I remember these moment(s) verrrrry well. Absolutely beautiful, Eddie I could not have asked for a more lovely present than words from your own heart and hand . . .  Susie |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
WOW oh WOW! ~~*~~ |
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
wow.for lack of something more poignant |
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