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Open Poetry #34
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought

0 posted 2004-12-14 04:59 AM



Her hair was brown.
Plain brown, and fell
above her shoulders.

She'd rarely wash it
'cause she hated standing naked
in right-out-of-the-shower-cold,
staring at that thing she was...

"Ugly and expendable."

She cried and swore,
because that's all she saw, I guess.
And no one disagreed with her.

No one really cared.

Every night she dreamt
of building a dream,
but two-by-fours and nails
only splintered her hopes.

At sun rise she would
curse her life,
because she wanted to be dead.
Then mourned the time that passed her
as she died a little more.


  


He was a man of sorrows
...I am a girl of tears.

[This message has been edited by GG (12-14-2004 08:41 AM).]

© Copyright 2004 GG - All Rights Reserved
Ericc
Member Elite
since 2003-01-31
Posts 4178

1 posted 2004-12-14 04:25 PM


Oh wow...this is so poigant and softly sorrowful.

What a truly excellent expression.

Eric

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2004-12-15 03:49 PM


::nodding head::

  captured this well ma'am....

nicely done....

miscellanea
Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060
OH
3 posted 2004-12-15 03:53 PM


agreeing; you captured this well.
        cathy

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
4 posted 2004-12-16 04:47 AM


a sadly beautiful write
*Alli4000*
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2004-03-21
Posts 3188
The World of Poetry
5 posted 2004-12-16 06:57 PM


agreed with everyone...sad yet amazing write.

~Alli~

Happy Holidays!

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
6 posted 2005-01-04 03:19 AM


Eric,
unfortunately I tend to do the sorrowful writes quite often. I'm glad you found poignency in this... despite that it isn't all too good. Thank you...

Cpat,
you're far too kind, 'cause I know you know this one isn't very good lol... You've no idea how much I appreciate your reading and replying

Always, Alyssa


He was a man of sorrows
...I am a girl of tears.

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
7 posted 2005-01-04 03:23 AM


Cathy,
you're awesome. Thank you so much!

Dix,
we tend to know the sad and beautiful, don't we? ...

Ali,
Thank you much. Amy is a sad yet amazing girl, too... So I'm honored you think I caught her the way she is.

Always, Alyssa

He was a man of sorrows
...I am a girl of tears.

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