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Red
Member

since 2000-01-01

Posts 143
Ca

0 posted 2004-07-27 09:04 AM

Suddenly
a clear and eternal vision comes to me:
We waltzed like flowers in a gentle spring breeze;
the sun, our drummer and time, our foe;
greenness all around us and dew in the air;
white lilies and rain-drops and moments so rare.

I see us now and I am awed by our brilliance,
the way that we danced in blissful nescience.

Softly my heart beats in reverence of beauty

the beauty
of flowers
in sun-lights
first kisses.

if only we knew now what we had known then
when we waltzed unaware of mortality
.

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

1 posted 2004-07-27 09:12 AM

sigh....if only's...yes, I agree, been there, under an arbor of roses, a beautiful picnic for two, at twilight under the waking stars....classical music for two...he..propped up his leg for me to lean on, while we shared our minds intimately...he was like having a very close girlfriend, one you can share your most inner thoughts with...wheww, nuff said, you took me to a time and place with your lovely words...a place of joy, a time of true love, and pure innocence.

Thank you for sharing.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

2 posted 2004-07-27 09:15 AM

"Softly my heart beats in reverence of beauty

the beauty
of flowers
in sun-lights
first kisses.

if only we knew now what we had known then
when we waltzed unaware of mortality"

What a beautiful bittersweet write.
Very much enjoyed.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
Dancing with you in the summer rain ~

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

3 posted 2004-07-27 09:16 AM

Welcome home, Red...
several layers of thought
in your byplay of poem's heart

Ratleader

Member Rara Avis

since 2003-01-23

Posts 7026
Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass

4 posted 2004-07-27 09:24 AM

I hope you're back for keeps -- this is beautiful stuff! If you are, here's one guy who will make it a point to read you.

~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº>
______________Ratleader______________

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

5 posted 2004-07-27 09:36 AM

"We waltzed like flowers in a gentle spring breeze;"

~ Delightful!

"if only we knew now what we had known then
when we waltzed unaware of mortality"

~ A very poignant close to your lovely poem.

EA

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

6 posted 2004-07-27 09:40 AM

Melissa~
Just a beautiful read~
Nice to see your ink~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

[email protected]

Red
Member

since 2000-01-01

Posts 143
Ca

7 posted 2004-07-27 09:41 AM

I never really leave, I'm just quiet

Thanks for the kind responses!

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

8 posted 2004-07-27 12:50 PM

beautiful piece

glad to read you again

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

9 posted 2004-07-27 11:04 PM

Red

Some of the most wonderful things happen, Suddenly. Much appreciated your poem's intent!

lgina
Member

since 2004-07-20

Posts 52

10 posted 2004-07-28 12:33 PM

we waltzed like flower in a gentle breeze. I can feel the breeze right now. Such lovely thoughts. I enjoyed this.

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

11 posted 2004-07-28 01:31 AM

Red, this was great....it even had a graceful waltz feel about it through the rhythm. Bravo! .....jo

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

12 posted 2004-07-28 03:04 PM

Very nice. Loved the closing line.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

13 posted 2004-07-29 04:45 PM

Softly my heart beats in reverence of beauty

the beauty
of flowers
in sun-lights
first kisses.

if only we knew now what we had known then
when we waltzed unaware of mortality

Such wistful beauty... excellent work!

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