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Open Poetry #33

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marcel
Senior Member

since 2003-03-02

Posts 660
az, usa

0 posted 2004-07-11 09:55 PM

When my eyes loved you that first glimpse
I had to have you in my life.
My heart told me you would be the one,
To rescue me from the shores of loneliness---
A far, far away place that sorrow has cast me;
My longing has set a reflective mood on the ocean
And I walked across its sunset beams to test reality;
But could God be so cruel to play a magician
And trick my eyes as would an illusionist?
For the sake of hope and happiness,
Let me inhale the fragrance of your essence
To release my soul from the bonds of doubt;
Let me kiss your soft lips and hands
To give me a taste of what Heaven should be;
Let your eyes, blurry with tears open up
So I can wipe away loneliness from your lovely face;
Let me strengthen your fragile heart with my love,
To prove to you that I am real.

Marcel

© Copyright 2004 keith marcel - All Rights Reserved

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

1 posted 2004-07-11 10:49 PM

These words reach far deeper than you may ever realize.
Magnificent in sentiment and totality.
Very real.
TD

Paper Tiger
Member

since 2003-09-28

Posts 77

2 posted 2004-07-12 01:20 AM

I like this. It has good structure, feeling, emotion, and it's complex and deep.

We see much, observe little, and perceive less.

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2004-07-12 04:20 AM

1slick_lady
Member Ascendant

since 2000-12-22

Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

4 posted 2004-07-12 08:52 AM

sigh

Marge Tindal

Deputy Moderator 5 Tours

Deputy Moderator 1 Tour

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Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

5 posted 2004-07-12 01:08 PM

Marcel~

'When my eyes loved you that first glimpse
I had to have you in my life'

*sighs* this lady~
*Huglets*
~*Marge*~

~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost,
the spirit rejoices over what it has left.
- Sufi epigram <))><

[email protected]

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

6 posted 2004-07-12 02:49 PM

Mmmm, very nice.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Midnitesun

Deputy Moderator 1 Tour

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

7 posted 2004-07-12 06:37 PM

quote:
My longing has set a reflective mood on the ocean.
And I walked across its sunset beams to test reality

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

8 posted 2004-07-13 10:32 PM

A definite encore required.
Enjoyed as much the second time around.
TD

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

9 posted 2004-07-13 11:12 PM

Beautiful, marcel.....so tender.

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