Open Poetry #33 |
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Sweetening Plumeria |
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James_A_Fraser Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972Out Making Anticlines |
Sweetening Plumeria As your hair falls shimmering disarray you catch the soft yellowwhite star where it would fall from behind your ear wave the blossom close tempt me the scent like dreams of honey rain sets my eyes adrift on island of flowers As the warm breeze combs you would replace it there then pause suddenly demure secret smile open silk from one button then two tuck it safe into a sweeter home |
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© Copyright 2004 James A. Fraser - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Uh-oh....I think I just caught myself peeking in on a very private moment...but smiling as I tiptoe away... |
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Kahlil Senior Member
since 2003-04-12
Posts 1881 |
oo-hoo....sweet, indeed... ~K~ |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Jamie Very gently told, this love story. ![]() |
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miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
dreams of honey rain sets my eyes adrift on island of flowers Just an example from your exquisite poem to illustrate what happens to this reader. You used the word "adrift," and with your format allowed the eyes to "drift" through the dreams of honey rain, the island, the flowers, (not in any particular order, but in somewhat of a circular or looping motion). The same happened with the word breeze. I like your poetry because it lends itself to continuance and savoring. misc'e |
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Susan Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104walking the surreal |
I am there, smelling the scent, touched by the breeze, caught in the romance of the moment, and sighing . . . ![]() Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
This is a very loving gentle sigh Jamie. A very tender moment indeed. Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
I thought misc'e summed up my thoughts pretty well. Much enjoyed.....jo |
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James_A_Fraser Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972Out Making Anticlines |
Thank you, friends.... I have to say this poem's a celebration of sorts. The Plumeria I planted this spring is 18" tall and has maybe ten leaves -- and three little blossoms. The scent of that flower just carries me off to Maui, so I wrote about it as romance. |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
The breeze isn't all that's warm!!! *S* Soft, sweet, sensual... your poem reflects the subject superbly! *S* Beautiful work, my friend! *S* |
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Marsha![]()
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
Jamie darling man, OH what can I say but WOW, this is softly sensuous and definitely a subtext here, I love it. Why is it you are such a great writer, and manage to evoke such feelings of warmth with a few well chosen and delicious words, when others miss the area completely? I guess its because you are a superb writer, and craft your poems with delicate finesse, and others don’t. Love this utterly, utterly, it is really one superb piece from you. I so love a poem that has style and substance, and yours always do. Great to see your writing darling one, it always impresses me. as always Mushy ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Tomorrow is another day I don't know what it holds |
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