Open Poetry #33 |
Whispering |
JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
Whispering At deaths door, not fear, but impending words of how to say all the kindness in phrases and words to share, and not to hate. Not to remember the frozen sullen face and the stench of cheap perfume, but quietly there patiently waiting for its dull motionless bell, ringing out its calling ping. Death’s sting… Recollections are the innocent faces of the children weeping. They are playing, so young, and their songs beautifully singing. Songs they had sung, their personalities, timeless thoughts, sudden decisions are wronged, the messenger’s drought… Yet, life renewed, prevails… Forgiveness holds the sun as it rises once again, the color of life opens refreshing light and warm summer rain and wind, but forgiveness of the expectant event, death’s sting, not to be forgotten, death left alone, pushed away, its destiny, fields of rotted cotton. Why? …Because confusion is sin. What about her plans reveled, they should count! Refusing to accept that the dance of death holds not her prize, better for her its doors and windows had opened wide. Swelling hate, and envy, and jealousy continue again, and again She whispers:” Who will win?”… ” Who will win?” At sunset the children praying, are hidden, and ashamed. Her burning passion for hate consumes the air, looked over, pushed aside, composure is regained… Thoughts and words of hate buried inside her bosom again. Her hopes dashed, put off for another try at a new end. Who will be standing, which one will be left to partake of the riches and joys that a life is best worth, at death’s gate. A race to the finish line, will it be hers to win? She was not there to greet death’s fear, not even a care. She is loved, but she is blinded by the glare. She is strife, and is sad, and enjoys that lonely life within. Echoing words are whispered, her candles lit and burning again. Her fists pounding the at the door of the grave… as her heart anxiously whispers its slave… ‘Who will win?’ ‘Who will win?’ |
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© Copyright 2004 JL - All Rights Reserved | |||
miscellanea Member Elite
since 2004-06-24
Posts 4060OH |
JL, I truly enjoy your writing. This alone is filling, but your whole poem is just lovely. "Forgiveness holds the sun as it rises once again, the color of life opens refreshing light and warm summer rain and wind, but forgiveness of the expectant event, death’s sting, not to be forgotten, death left alone, pushed away, its destiny, fields of rotted cotton." Nice... misc'e |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
JL Death is the only winner. Enjoyed the read. |
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rwood Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793Tennessee |
Poignant verse. Such a plethora of emotions, natural in the visions of death. So many pictures, negatives, and calling questions. I agree with Sy's response, though I imagine (or at least I'm hopeful) that we are valiant to the end, if we have a shred of goodness left in us. Sincerely, Reg |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
JL "Forgiveness holds the sun as it rises once again, the color of life opens refreshing light and warm summer rain and wind, but forgiveness of the expectant event, death’s sting, not to be forgotten," Forgivness has much power over both life and death. Insightful writing! |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
forgiveness is a blessing...but sometimes takes the time it takes to yield a cultured pearl... maybe you cannot forget, and perhaps shouldn't but forgiveness is nothing short of Godlike in heart and mind...and the key to moving in toward a deeper light. Your poems are so passionate and written with elegant understanding. Compassion is your forte my friend...thank you for sharing. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Wonderful write...you do have so much compassion. Hugs~ ~Somewhere in my heart I'm always |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
what can I say that hasn't been said before me here |
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vandana
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463USA |
enjoyed |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
All of you poets are way too kind, but I do appreciate the heartening words. Thank you so much! God bless you all! JL |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Very well written piece indeed. Chris Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale. |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
With death, comes Light! ~ and life! ~ albeit in a different form! A very emotion-packed write! Stirring, yet somewhat unsettling. No one could read this poem and not be moved on at least one level. Love & Light, EA |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
JL~ The layering of thought gives this piece such depth~ You seem to have a way of drawing us into your pennings ... we emerge richer for the read~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
JL, I have read this three times now. I am impressed with the depth of it. You address so many things and I can apply them to my own life and watching others age or become acquainted with the inevitable. As much as we forgive and remember, I have seen the aging process make sour, bitter people out of the best of us (that makes me sad). The answer....you penned that, too -- outstanding. As a matter of fact, just this morning, a friend and I were talking. I think it is kind of like this.....sometimes we lose people before they are really gone. I want to believe they left at their best -- but maybe that is wishful thinking. Beautiful, and haunting poem, JL! And, I'll be reading it again as more meaning unfolds. ....jo |
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