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Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

0 posted 2004-10-10 04:15 AM

I can sit amongst the flower’s bloom
And realize they will all be gone soon
As winter’s chill slips in more each night,
I can walk across the colored Autumn
Crunching beneath a journey almost done
Fading softly into growing twilight,
I can wade inside the trickling streams
As it washes away yesterday’s dreams,
Knowing there is no wrong or right,
But only an approaching tomb
In the fading of my life’s sun
And silence of painful screams
As I fade from sight.

Gloom

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis

since 2001-12-29

Posts 7115
South Africa

1 posted 2004-10-10 04:26 AM

So very well written but sad - there's always another way to face the ending.

CocoBaci
Member Elite

since 2000-05-06

Posts 3043

2 posted 2004-10-10 04:45 AM

As always, fantastic writing!

*~coco~*

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

3 posted 2004-10-10 05:31 AM

I can relate, yes

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

4 posted 2004-10-10 08:53 AM

Gloomy one....loved the taste of Autumn (not much crunching here at this time)...

The ending was in true gloom style.

"cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind"
~Sarah McLachlan~

Copperbell
Senior Member

since 2003-11-08

Posts 956

5 posted 2004-10-10 03:25 PM

-and what fingerprints did a man leave upon the earth he trod for so long?
-what friends and loved ones will hold him dearly in their hearts - even telling younguns of him?
-will the person fade, or will it be a stark loss to all who admired him
-and what smiles will exist on the other side, as his Creator embraces the one he made and so dearly cherished - from birth until the days of fragility
-and the hands scarred with love welcomes him, even do I dare say with tears of joy

miscellanea
Member Elite

since 2004-06-24

Posts 4060
OH

6 posted 2004-10-12 12:12 PM

Gloom,

  When I first read this, I thought it depressing.  But after re-reading it, I see the words more clearly. (At least, I think I do!)  "I can" are very positive words, as is the image of silent screams fading away.  (Who needs those anyway?)

"I can sit amongst the flower’s bloom
And realize they will all be gone soon
As winter’s chill slips in more each night,
I can walk across the colored Autumn
Crunching beneath a journey almost done
Fading softly into growing twilight,
I can wade inside the trickling streams
As it washes away yesterday’s dreams,
Knowing there is no wrong or right,
But only an approaching tomb
In the fading of my life’s sun
And silence of painful screams
As I fade from sight."

Your writing always intriques me.  Sometimes I feel like I'm entering a maze when reading it, just trying to perceive the intended meaning.   You leave it open for so many interpretations!  Enjoyed.
            miscellanea

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

7 posted 2004-10-12 12:14 PM

I've missed reading you, Professor, and I'm glad to know this is but a poem, and there will be no fading of your poems...

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

8 posted 2004-10-12 01:21 PM

you have indeed communed with nature and realize the positives...brilliant, thank you for writing and sharing.

Professor Gloom
Member Elite

since 2000-07-23

Posts 3082
of Depression

9 posted 2004-10-13 09:27 PM

Thank You, All
I regret that time has been working against me,
lessening my poetry
and make few response to response,
I am warmed by them,

Gloom

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