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Open Poetry #33
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Spine Grinder
Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...

0 posted 2004-09-19 06:34 PM



I sit here alone,
And these tears fall,
(They fall so often it seems…)
Once again…
I don’t even try
To stop them…
(It’s useless.)

I had a dream,
Of you never coming back to me…
(More like a nightmare…)
I awoke with a shiver,
And a tear frozen on my cheek.
I’m lost without you…
(My world falls apart…)

I need you to be here,
To keep me safe and warm…
(Hold me through the night…)
Whisper in my ear,
All those comforting words,
To make every bad thing okay…
(I love you Baby…never let me go...)

"I tried so hard...But in the end...It doesn't even matter...."~Linkin Park

"I shut my eyes and hold my cries to myself"~ Taproot

© Copyright 2004 Staci Weidner - All Rights Reserved
Susan
Member Ascendant
since 2004-03-27
Posts 5104
walking the surreal
1 posted 2004-09-19 06:58 PM


Moving, this-

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you.  Joy is a state of mind.

DavePage
Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917

2 posted 2004-09-19 07:52 PM


Please bear with me whilst I suggest alternatives

Alone tears so often cry out dreaming of what could be
Wetting my cheeks in anticipation of you beside me
Speaking words I can believe

The substance is there, the imagination is there but you seem to feel you need to over word.

Please take my comments as positive - you have the talent and imagination.

regards

Dave



Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

3 posted 2004-09-20 07:56 AM


I had a dream,
Of you never coming back to me…
(More like a nightmare…)
I awoke with a shiver,
And a tear frozen on my cheek.
I’m lost without you…
(My world falls apart…)

It is these kind of dreams that make us happy that sometimes dreams are just that and nothing more....and other times dreams,
do come true. May yours always come true, dear gal.  
You are becoming quite the little writer these days Stac....and me?  I am very very proud to see you grow....

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
4 posted 2004-09-20 09:45 AM


WOW!!  Your writing is growing in leaps and bounds!
This is wonderful!!
Hugs~

~Autumn..the year's last, loveliest smile.~

Spine Grinder
Senior Member
since 2000-10-28
Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...
5 posted 2004-09-20 04:21 PM


Thanks everyone, yeah Aunt Donna, I have been writing a lot lately, but I have a lot to write about...lol, I'm glad you liked this.

"I tried so hard...But in the end...It doesn't even matter...."~Linkin Park

"I shut my eyes and hold my cries to myself"~ Taproot

Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
6 posted 2004-09-20 04:39 PM


This was effective.  It moved me.

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
7 posted 2004-09-22 12:06 PM


yes a very moving heartfelt poem


ShiningWindHaze
Member
since 2004-09-06
Posts 138
California, United States
8 posted 2004-09-22 04:31 AM


in the end it always matters if you want it to.

- Haze

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