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soul drifter
Senior Member

since 2004-09-08

Posts 711
Colorado

0 posted 2004-09-14 01:38 AM

Alicia

Alicia is spinning around the bus depot
as I'm counting my miracles on the floor
her scarlet hair is making me aware
of the first bitter taste of freedom
she's five years older than I
she's less in this world than I
and I swear I've loved her always
daydreaming in my sleep
of dreams I can't reach
this keeps my feet on the ground
while I watch Alicia waltzing with clouds
it's an apricot colored world today
and Alicia's covering up the dawn
with the dark green demeanor of her soul
to let me sleep a little longer
my head rests on her jean jacket
with peace sign patches
and the smell of sunflower seeds
and I call out loud with parched lips
and a plane ticket in my hand
Alicia, save my love for a rainy day
Alicia, take this ticket to Tampa
to live with your crochet smile
and your teardrop memories
I can't fit into you plans
like your hand fits into my pants
and your pretty rosepetal lips
make me all too aware
that I'm missing my home
but she only frowns a happy frown
takes me by the hand
and whispers into my ear
"I can't make it alone
I can't make love grow inside me
without you around
don't be a fool to be a tool
to be used, abused and fused
to the ugly side of fate
to the beautiful side of me you will stay
stuck like candy to me"
Alicia is spinning around in my blood
showing proof of my stupidity
and kissing me all over
one layover and two people
in love, in tow of all we know
I look at Florida brouchures
Alicia is biting her nails
and telling me about her hopes
all I know is she is all my hopes
my sweet Alicia

"Poets are all who love, who feel great truths, and tell them; and the truth of truths is love." --Philip James Bailey

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2004-09-14 01:41 AM

dang! what a write! I love your style!

DavePage
Member Elite

since 2003-12-21

Posts 2917

2 posted 2004-09-14 12:00 PM

Your almost writing Dylan - Bob here.

Yes the talent is there.

Can I suggest that you read these words as if you speaking to an audience.

dave

miscellanea
Member Elite

since 2004-06-24

Posts 4060
OH

3 posted 2004-09-14 12:08 PM

don't be a fool to be a tool
to be used, abused and fused
to the ugly side of fate
to the beautiful side of me you will stay
stuck like candy to me"

especially cool!

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

4 posted 2004-09-14 07:50 PM

sometimes you almost overwhelm with imagery...but I like what you have to say, just don't lose your reader midway in your poem

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

5 posted 2004-09-14 10:03 PM

WOW!

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

6 posted 2004-09-14 10:44 PM

You've given us another fascinating portrait, taking a small slice of life, aiming your camera-lens-mind, and zooming in quickly for the closeup shot. Nice, very nicely done.

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