Open Poetry #33 |
I Lost My Heart Today |
Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
I Lost My Heart Today By Paul Wilson I lost my heart today could you please help me find it I’ve looked everywhere at least twice… I admit The glow that filled my life has left without a trace Where happiness use too be sorrow now takes it’s place I’ve looked high and low searching throughout the day Where could my heart be why did it run away? Teardrops stain the pillow where your head use to lay Your name echo’s off the walls twenty four hours a day I looked back into yesterday praying for a clue I might find I visited all the old places we shared when you were mine There’s only one more place too look… for my lost heart A place I forgot about since we’ve been apart A box where I keep everything special too me This special box I have but you have the key ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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© Copyright 2004 Paul D. Wilson - All Rights Reserved | |||
Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
This poem brought a tender feel to me and a slight bit of sadness...a good thing. You seem to be working hard on your rhyming and putting the lines together. One thing you can do that will help you begin to write with more unique rhyme is to us a rhyming dictionary/thesaurus to help with the words you pick to rhyme from....RhymeZone has a good one that you can put with your favorites and go to whenever you want to. It helps me often. We are all learning...trust me, I know very well.... |
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Kristabell Senior Member
since 2003-11-29
Posts 678Portland, OR |
Your poem is great! It portrays a sence of sadness that I wish no one had to feel, but if no one felt this, then no one could be happy. Good job!! |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I know how this feels good longing write here Paul |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
The glow that filled my life has left without a trace Where happiness use too be sorrow now takes it’s place This verse and I are entirely too well acquainted. *S* Excellent write! *S* |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
I could feel the ache in the words. Beautiful writing Paul. |
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Paul Wilson
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711United States |
Barry...Thanks so much for taking time too read and reply. A special thanks for your words on how I might improve on my writing...Paul Kristabell...Glad you enjoyed this.Thanks for your reply...Paul passing shadows...A sad time felt by everyone at one time or another made easier to handle by the good times in our lives. Thanks for caring and taking the time too read and reply...Paul suthern...That is my favorite stanza also. Yes we are well aquainted with those feelings. Hopefully with time we get thru them...Paul Gentle Spirit...Thank you so much for understanding.Glad you enjoyed...Paul ~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~ |
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