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Open Poetry #33
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Susurration of a Grandmother
| Open Poetry #33 |
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Susurration of a Grandmother |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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Susurration of a Grandmother Still there is the innocent sky cloaked and holding in a wheeze desperate turning over leaf licking until its cement shadow is undone and for a minute though yet to come the tongue of Autumn fills my mouth and releases a love song within the perfect chamber damp a slip of almost cool breath Time opens past the fracture of the screen Picking up the sound my own in earnest taking me up past blue innocent sky to hum a thin and delicate true lullaby |
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| © Copyright 2004 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
OhMartieSis~ I know this song by heart ... and you ink-sing it so beautifully~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Is it the water? Do you brew a special tea? Or is it just being Martie, and seeing things through refracted light? IWIHWT... and IWICWLY |
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Goodknight Member Elite
since 2002-06-15
Posts 2386Ohio, USA |
Martie - did that grandaughter's song you were listening to while you wrote help inspire this  - I just love your poetry and now I add another to the collection of loved martie poems!! Paul |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
Martie, somehow...you are capable of singing a song to a key we could never sing ourselves...and when finished...somehow we manage to understand and see the joy of what you have given us. Thanx Martie Girl... |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
NOWEWLY - as there is only one Martie, only one! Fascinating and oh it was most beautiful.  I will email you the answer |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
What a delightful, delicate whisper of love! *S* |
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Gentle Spirit Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989 |
The whispers that you hear become the most beautiful music Martie... never stop sharing them with us.. ever...  |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
and for a minute though yet to come the tongue of Autumn fills my mouth and releases a love song within the perfect chamber damp a slip of almost cool breath grandmama will be so warmed by this simply written as only you can do...words which are washed by the music of nature...combining to form clear magic |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
lovely |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
deeply affecting...beautifully whipsered so enchanting...yet i feel a tinge of sad. |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
"Time opens past the fracture of the screen" loved it Martie! Especially that line above! "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
What an exquisite lullaby, and a soft loving tribute to the memory of your grandmother. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Time opens past the fracture of the screen ----------------------------- you always have such poignant personifications...then you wrap them in such poetic imagery... innocent sky cloaked and holding in a wheeze desperate turning over leaf licking until its cement shadow is undone ------------- amazing layers in this Martie-girl.  |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Hi all...thank you so much for your wonderful replies ....I have to confess that I am the grandmother in this poem....I'm babysitting my two grandgirls this week...and recalled the songs I sang when I was a young mother....they are love songs. Both my grandmothers died when I was young. My granddaughters are 1 and 2 1/2 ....and angels most of the time... |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
nicely said ma'am... |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
It is not likely that I will see grandchildren of my own. I envy you the experience. |
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ice Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404Pennsylvania |
Applause! Although I did have to look up the word.. Susurration.... [n] speaking softly without vibration of the vocal cords [n] the indistinct sound of people whispering I didn't mind looking it up, it made the poem more awesome. enjoyed -------ice ><> |
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James_A_Fraser Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972Out Making Anticlines |
Lullaby perhaps, but somehow this also brings me the feel of a love song....one sung slow and soft, and almost too quietly to hear. Those angel cadets are lucky to have someone like you to watch over them. |
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jellybeans Member Elite
since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298 |
well thanks to icebox, I didn't have to look up the word *g* and yes the definition made the poem even nicer |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
Such a wonderful poem! Beautiful. JL |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Now how did I possibly miss this sensitive piece of your heart? Lovely - hope you survived them Boy, do I know that exhaustion when it hits. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Martie, I wish I could write like you. You're an incredible poet and lady. You know just how to captivate the reader. This is another one of your best. and a  love you lady keeping it. Mxx The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colour, but the sea, does not change. |
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kayjay Member Elite
since 2002-06-24
Posts 2015Oregon |
The grandparent is in all of us, whether we revere ours, or revere our grandchildren, or those yet to come. Nicely done. KJ Through rubble and trouble and dark of night |
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EvocativeVerse2 Senior Member
since 2003-09-10
Posts 1279 |
Hi Martie...love this. You just brought a smile to my face. Thanks! Remember, if you're not part of the future, you're history! |
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GG Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532Lost in thought |
Grandma's are the best... and there isn't anything more refreshing and just-plain-sweet then listening to a Grandma sing a lullaby. Though I guess seeing one write of it comes pretty awfully close I LOVE this... read it over and over and just didn't know how to reply... Always, Alyssa Poems are made by fools like me, |
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