Open Poetry #33 |
The Beat Of The Blue Moon . . (a poem in dual voice) |
James_A_Fraser Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972Out Making Anticlines |
Why do stars Too, too rash, stand so very close, too bright tonight, loud, nearly tasteless like would-be lovers, on the purple black the flashing diamonds, ‘til the sky shines like all the pearly sequins a velvet painting? set on purple black And the big moon with their painted-on why come out now white fluorescence striding out here to play like Elvis in those blue to the crowd in suede shoes, this flea market tight white art gallery. jeans cut Rock it, way low? moon! Oh, the beat of the blue moon ! |
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© Copyright 2004 James A. Fraser - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I found me a Library *click* Karilea - if I whisper, will you listen? Keeping in mind, I must stand close... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Jamie Interesting what you've done with this...I like the form and can see the sky in velvet singing blue suede...yep! Enjoyed! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Wonderful Jamie!!! I love this! How creative you are! Hugs~ ~ Those who complain the sun has gone out of their world |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
YOU ROCK! This is awesome! |
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iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
An ABSOLUTE WOW, Mr. Fraser!!! ....jo |
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MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
loved this very creative touch |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I don't use this term very often... but it's completely applicable here... BRILLIANT! Whether I read this as two poems or as one, your words are perfect... the outstanding visual aspect just leaves me awestruck. *S* |
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muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
oh wow...this is great!! Laughing at just how clever it is |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
OhJaime~ THIS ... THIS is beautiful in both voices~ I love the heart of you~ *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*When the heart grieves over what it has lost, |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
This one is so cool...don't think I can try the fancy stuff. I've been trying to write in dual voice and so far no dialogue has commenced. (One side of me keeps me winning!) But I'll keep this one for study too, if you don't mind. Enjoyed. |
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