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Facing Fears
| Dark Poetry #1 |
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Facing Fears |
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Jana Tovey Member
since 2000-05-30
Posts 257USA |
I am here listening to you as you freely expound upon my selfishness, arguing for the sake of argument, puerile and puffed up, hot wind bellowing from within you. Why do you become so vehement? Does it delay the inevitable, the reckoning that will have to come, some day, probably in the distant future? the facing up to whatever you are avoiding… the dealing with what you have become? I am here hearing you blame me, and other family members, for the woe that befalls you, and I wonder at the way you twist tough love into callous disregard, calling me uncaring, stupid, not worthy of your regard. Your disdain once cut me to the quick, but now it is expected, and merely serves to strengthen my resolve, to cease enabling the weakness and dependency, that you despise about yourself, but seem too afraid to shake away from. As a child you hated the unexpected, new experiences frightened you… and now you are frightened of your future, you avoid the facing of your fears, by focusing all that is hateful within you on me, the one who knows you best and sees what you could become. You have the potential to dive deep into a sardonic pool, one that will color your outlook on all that surrounds you, and bind you to inaction and ineptitude. Or, you could shake off the fears of failing, fears that paralyze you from acting on your own behalf, and widen your horizon beyond the scope of ego-protection. I pity your lack of courage, your lack of adventure. I recognize the material of the spiteful retorts that you spin, cocoon-like, around your fragile ego. You try to appear pompous and self-righteous, but are obviously scared witless of the unknown… If you do not face these fears and conquer them, you will never know what you are capable of achieving, what you are worthy of experiencing, what you are talented enough to master, what this life has to offer, in good and bad experiences… the kind of things that tell you... that you are truly alive. (I wrote this about my eldest son, because he wouldn't go to college where he belonged. I never showed it to him until later on. He is at college now.) |
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| © Copyright 2000 Jana Tovey - All Rights Reserved | |||
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lotharingia Senior Member
since 2000-06-04
Posts 897saarbruecken, Germany |
This is a really interesting way to get a point across to someone, even if you didn't use it. I'm sure many of us recognise snapshots of people we know or even ourselves in this. Great psychology! |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Jana, I can relate to what your son is feeling. When I was younger, a few years ago I grew away from my mother. We spent some time arguing, I was high strung, she mistook things I did as rebellious behaviour. I am alot calmer now, and closer to my mother. That choice of going to college is a hard one, a lot of pressure on the shoulders of your son. I know that deep inside he loves you dearly though I don't think anger was the best way for him to deal with the situation. Anyway, I hope he is happy now. thanks for sharing, really enjoyed this poem. As a child you hated the unexpected, new experiences frightened you… and now you are frightened of your future, you avoid the facing of your fears, by focusing all that is hateful within you on me, the one who knows you best and sees what you could become. You have the potential to dive deep into a sardonic pool, one that will color your outlook on all that surrounds you, and bind you to inaction and ineptitude. Or, you could shake off the fears of failing, fears that paralyze you from acting on your own behalf, and widen your horizon beyond the scope of ego-protection. I pity your lack of courage, your lack of adventure. I recognize the material of the spiteful retorts that you spin, cocoon-like, around your fragile ego. You try to appear pompous and self-righteous, but are obviously scared witless of the unknown… I am sure his confidence will grow and he become a strong and couragous man. I was scared and wided eye when I moved away to college. It shaped me, and I met two dear friends who helped me find peace and happiness in myself. ------------------------ "I've been too honest with myself I should have lied like everybody else"-Richey Edwards "Take nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time". Baltimore Grotto "Libraries gave us power Then work came and made us free What price now for a shallow piece of dignity" Nicky Wire, A design for Life. manic street preachers "Rock 'n' roll is our epiphany Culture, alienation, boredom and despair" "To be nobody-but-yourself-in a world which is doing its best night and day, to make you everybody else - means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting." E.E Cummings. |
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amazon_lover Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491Dublin,Ireland |
Hi Jana That was very beautiful. If we close ourselves to world we're nothing but decaying vegetable without fresh air. Conquering the fears and despondencies is vital and you brought it out very beautifully. Sincerely A_L |
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amazon_lover Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491Dublin,Ireland |
Hi Jana That was very beautiful. If we close ourselves to world we're nothing but decaying vegetable without fresh air. Conquering the fears and despondencies is vital and you brought it out very beautifully. Sincerely A_L |
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