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Dark Poetry #1
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Drawing Closer
| Dark Poetry #1 |
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Drawing Closer |
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For_Never Member
since 1999-10-27
Posts 125Cincinnati, oh, United States of America |
Darkness drawing inside my head.. so dark I just can't see... That emptiness for my soul to see.. feels like I am lost to anybody.. even me... Never seen salvations dawn... never drank from those sweet lips... oh...but I have drowned within those eyes.. thoughs eye which don't seem to see me... she can't see me... This worlds a garden... and I am the weed.. and with the flowers all around... none will ever know me... ever know me... ~Fin~ EAB "..Hello...is there anyone out there?..." Pink Floyd |
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| © Copyright 2000 Edward A. Beerman - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Jannel Member
since 2000-01-18
Posts 492Muncie, IN, USA |
very nice open style. especially liked "the world is a flower and i am a weed. how many times have we all felt that. jannel "I'm just saying that we've mistaken one for thousands of words, and for that mistake I've caused you such pain that I damn that word." -10000 Maniacs "Jezebel" |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
Love the slight gothic feel you snuck in here For Never, poetic beauty is always yours whether the poem is sad or not. Well done my friend  May the world hug you today, With it's warmth and love. I pray it whispers a joyful tune in your heart, That tell you there is a friend sitting in another corner of the world, Wishing you well and wishing you love...... ~Isis~ (Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit) |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Darkness drawing inside my head.. so dark I just can't see... That emptiness for my soul to see.. feels like I am lost to anybody.. even me... Never seen salvations dawn... never drank from those sweet lips... oh...but I have drowned within those eyes.. thoughs eye which don't seem to see me... she can't see me... -------------------- for never--this poem is AWESOME...truly, the line break presentation is perfect to give impact to the emotions of the poem...which are also perfect. I relate to this one WAY too well today... I seem to be getting really good at being invisible my self... excellent poem my friend, take care jm and you can say baby... baby can I hold you tonight maybe if told you the right words... at the right time, you'd be mine... baby can I hold you tonight... tracy chapman |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
I've been that weed of which you speak. Hate the feeling - love the poem. Michael |
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dhuron Member
since 2000-03-19
Posts 476 |
"This worlds a garden... and I am the weed.." Those two lines speak with such force. Well done!! The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, not the kindly smile, not the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to one when he discovers that someone believes in him and is willing to trust him with his friendship." --Ralph Waldo Emerson |
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For_Never Member
since 1999-10-27
Posts 125Cincinnati, oh, United States of America |
Thanks everyone. I think e all feel like the weed among the garden at some point in time.. I just hope we all find that isn't the case.. because.weeds don't just look about in the garden..they choke the life from it.. Who knows...MAybe the garden this really a bed of weeds, and the flowers just stand out... |
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Joel the wolf Senior Member
since 2000-04-06
Posts 1333Angels Camp |
Well we know you Kid. I'll howwwlll for this one. Joel. I howl a mornful song, that echos within my chambered heart, for all to read? nay for all to feel. |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
But yet, you still grow there.....and with your poetry you bloom Kathleen |
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