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Wikket
Member
since 2000-01-29
Posts 340
Santa Clara, CA USA

0 posted 2000-03-18 08:40 PM


"Passing the Time Away"

Joining a state of consciousness
I'd rather leave unsaid
I find a plane of pleasantness
My body turns to lead

The clouds begin to wander by
Angels within the smoke
I fight the feeling, wanting to cry
Only forming a choke

The trickle of salt down my face
Has left my liner run
My friends take off in absurd chase
To find a loaded gun

Wish my time would wither away
And leave me to my maze
I know not one excuse to stay
'Cept to enjoy the haze

My friends have found the instrument
For my self-destruction
I volunteer to implement
Their foolish instruction

Whizz the cylinder, "Watch me gang,
The barrels at my head..."
Squeezeclick, squeezeclick, squeezeclick, squeezeBANG
'Why am I not yet dead?'

--Wrote this one a while ago when I didn't think too highly of my life or myself.  I'm kind of glad I'm not seeing every minute like this anymore...  Thank goodness for the small victories!  --Jamie     

© Copyright 2000 Jamie Carlson - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-03-18 08:47 PM


YEA YEA...jamie has come to the dark sandbox to play..

Wish my time would wither away
And leave me to my maze
I know not one excuse to stay
'Cept to enjoy the haze

My friends have found the instrument
For my self-destruction
I volunteer to implement
Their foolish instruction
------------
wow Jamie, this is dark and powerful... Im glad you dont feel this way anymore eihter.. though we all have our days...
very well written and expresses...(chills)
glad you snuck out of the pub(smile)
take care, jm

 Now for me some words come easy
But I know that they don't mean that much
Compared with the things that are said when lovers touch
You never knew what I loved in you
I don't know what you loved in me
Maybe the picture of somebody you were hoping I might be
jackson browne



Broken Wings
Member
since 2000-03-18
Posts 157
Miami, FL.
2 posted 2000-03-18 08:51 PM


I understand the feelings you were going through.
I'm also gald that you  don't see life in that way 24/7 anymore.
take care
Broken Wings  


 "As you learn and grow, you will realize the greater the pain, the greater the growth."
BY: IYANLA VANZANT

Aiden Kelly
Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 148
Ft. Wayne, IN USA
3 posted 2000-03-19 03:43 AM


i'm glad you made it through...i have a friend who commited suicide that way... you truly have a way with words, hon!  the rhythm is almost more of a cadence in how natural it sounds. very vivid imagery. great work.  
Jesse Jaymz
Senior Member
since 2000-01-24
Posts 708
Youngstown, ohio
4 posted 2000-03-19 05:18 AM


glad to see that you made it through.  it took a dark night in may for me to figure out that i needed to live my life to the fullest.  there is 13 scars on my arm to remind me of what not to do.  now i can see the light.  and it is a damn good one.  great poem

 Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel is just a frieght train coming your way...
MetallicA


Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
5 posted 2000-03-19 07:11 PM


Welcome to the dark forum Jaime!!  Really liked this piece, I too, am glad you are not feeling this way any longer.  Just a little reminder though, nothing too graphic ok?
Thanks

 May the world hug you today,
With it's warmth and love.
I pray it whispers a joyful tune in your heart,
That tell you there is a friend sitting in another corner of the world,
Wishing you well and
wishing you love......
~Isis~
(Goddess - Sovereign of the Spirit)


Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
6 posted 2000-03-19 09:51 PM


Welcome Jamie.  Powerful words and images.  I understand the feelings and am happy you do not feel that way all the time.  Excellent!

 Friends are friend forever if the Lord's the Lord of them and a friend will not say never cause the welcome will not end.
--Michael W. Smith

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