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Raul Noriega
Junior Member

since 2000-02-12

Posts 11

0 posted 2000-02-12 11:57 PM

Sights of red and smoke-filled air
Shade the walls on which I stare

A friend of stars and student of
a child's pure and honest love

Eyes that cry when refusing to see
the many beasts inside of me

My little saviors to whom I reach
and beg on knee for me to teach

Oh the many faces of nightmares old
in tampered vaults my secrets hold

And mirrors on walls
of tarnished halls
with sticky stains
echo the small
forgotten calls
of my remains

My angels

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

1 posted 2000-02-13 12:51 PM

Raul,
WELCOME to Dark Passions!!

this poem is EXCELLENT!!!
it flows perfectly with rhyme and is full of imagery and expression. I really enjoyed it!
take care, janet marie

In the time we've known
That we each are a part of one another
We've lost as much as we have won...
And as our lives have grown
We have found that it only brings us pain
To hang on to the things that we have done...
***Still I love the times you've come***

Jackson Browne

JennyLee
Senior Member

since 1999-09-01

Posts 1461
Northwestern, NJ.

2 posted 2000-02-13 01:59 PM

I loved this wonderful piece. The writing has a style I adore. Well Done.

And mirrors on walls
of tarnished halls
with sticky stains
echo the small
forgotten calls
of my remains

Descriptive reflections of the soul.

Jennifer

Isis
Member Ascendant

since 1999-09-06

Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland

3 posted 2000-02-13 08:14 PM

Welcome indeed!
Wonderful reflections here, I like your style

Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen closely.
~Isis~
(Sovereign of the Spirit)

Aimster
Member Elite

since 2000-02-19

Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC

4 posted 2000-02-29 05:32 PM

~well i know im late to read this one, sorry new to dark passions...was told to come here by a friend *wink*. this was really great though. i loved the imagery, and the depth of emotion. wonder where you get your inspiration to write from, it is a different style, but i liked it. thanks

amy

~Live today as though it were your last but prepare for tomorrow as though it were here~

blueyz75
Member

since 1999-12-28

Posts 138
IL

5 posted 2000-02-29 07:40 PM

Very cool. I see this carcass left for dead with angels hovering over it in my mind!

Kelly

I love the male body, it's better designed than the male mind.---Andrea Newman

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

6 posted 2000-03-03 06:11 AM

I liked this Raul. Has a really nice flow. James

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