»
Archives
»
Dark Poetry #1
»
For Understanding (first draft -- does this make sense?)
| Dark Poetry #1 |
|
For Understanding (first draft -- does this make sense?) |
|
|
poetry_kills Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549new orleans |
I had a rather disturbing idea the other day and this poem was it's child... please let me know if the poem conveys the idea clearly enough... thank you  For Understanding What if I with granite lips Would kiss the barrel of a gun? And what if I, with sullen face, Pressed such against your mind? What if I with apricot wrist Made love to razor blade? To sleep -- no more to wake... All for the purpose of understanding. Would they all forget who I am? Would they deem me insane or perhaps They'd claim they knew all along That I was destined to crack? Really I just want to know: Tomorrow would you feel the same To love this querying man Who by daylight would be branded lunatic By a society unmoved? "He always was a little weird." "We should have seen the signs." Would newsmen presume to know me Or to understand my heart and mind? What would they say about me And who would they convince To dehumanize my memory And you... Yes you, sweet child... Would you forget my name? I'd risk it all to answer this: Would you love me still the same? A savage place! as holy and enchanted As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted By woman wailing for her demon-lover! ~Coleridge |
||
| © Copyright 2000 Jerome Solomon - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
This is a rather scary poem. Thinking about taking one's life, asking yourself who would miss you and if you'd be missed, especially by a child. Of course a child would miss you and still love you ! Great translation of feeling though ! |
||
|
poetry_kills Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549new orleans |
mundra:  i never thought that might be taken literally... the "child" i refer to was really meant to be seen as my lover (or girlfriend)... i am glad it got its point across though...  i was worried it wouldn't convey my odd ideas... thank you, jerome the boy with the blue thumb A savage place! as holy and enchanted As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted By woman wailing for her demon-lover! ~Coleridge |
||
|
armanca Member
since 1999-07-07
Posts 211Tennessee |
To assume to know someone...that is the most deadly thing to do. For even us...the ones who write our poetry...It isn't always as it seems. And thoughts can be just thoughts...ideas merely ideas. Not with an essence of what makes the person..or what will begin and end a person. And if someone knew me by my poetry alone...they would know only a pen drop. Because I am many things...and my poetry reflects a piece of my mind...that can be silently heard. *smile* I loved this Jerome. And it is a thought...that goes through many sane minds. And it is not one that defines an individual. Carman |
||
|
poetry_kills Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549new orleans |
carman: to be praised by one so well-developed as a writer, i think i'm ready to take on shakespeare *waa haa haa*... but seriously, i do not think of suicide, but it occured to me the other day... everyone who kills themself, everyone who kills someone else is labelled "disturbed" and people start searching to understand "what drove them to do such a thing"... but what if i did it just to find out if they would start to search for reasons in my life? would people think differently of me tomorrow?... it's a disturbing thought... *heh* anyway, jerome the boy with no brain A savage place! as holy and enchanted As e'er beneath a waning moon was haunted By woman wailing for her demon-lover! ~Coleridge |
||
|
childomine Senior Member
since 2000-01-25
Posts 818st. petersburg, FL |
deeply thought provoking and right on que for those who have been to that dark place. |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
