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navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #1 » Photographic Memory
Dark Poetry #1
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Jannel
Member
since 2000-01-18
Posts 492
Muncie, IN, USA
0 posted 2000-01-29 10:37 PM


Word wished unutterable
echo through canyons of sleep
Places better unvisited
turn up along every road
Visions of hope slaughtered
Portraits of tears
All wearing his skin
Naive belief over my neck
Impatient guillotine
© Copyright 2000 Jannel - All Rights Reserved
JennyLee
Senior Member
since 1999-09-01
Posts 1461
Northwestern, NJ.
1 posted 2000-02-02 10:09 AM

Visions of hope slaughtered
Portraits of tears

I liked this piece...
My only suggestion would be...to expand upon these feelings. It was too short  

Jennifer
JOY 14
Senior Member
since 1999-09-22
Posts 1419
Wisconsin USA
2 posted 2000-02-02 02:31 PM

I also liked your line of Visions of hope slaughtered.  Very descriptive!  
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navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #1 » Photographic Memory

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