Open Poetry #32 |
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Not knowing how.......... |
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gemjop Member Elite
since 2002-11-18
Posts 2587Pencilveinia, USA ![]() |
I would still bring you from behind the scented blossom air and I do despise myself. With a good man that curls me around his heart in every moment eyes meet, there is no comparison but I do and I hate myself . . . Still finding you in the silence of all journeys alone with passing fields reminders of summer's breath never the loneliness, and I know I'm a fool when our special something had rotted a concrete death long before this with the blossom fallen and I could sever your roots that seem to hold me in position but I don't know how . . . |
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© Copyright 2004 gj - All Rights Reserved | |||
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
gemjop I think you just did, enjoyed. |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
and I could sever your roots that seem to hold me in position but I don't know how . . . good question the words help it along the way good to read you again |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
It's hard, huh? I wish I knew the answer. But I love your words and how you bind them together. ![]() "cast me gently into the morning, for the night has been unkind" |
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jonmcm Member
since 2000-10-11
Posts 222England |
Gemjop, Powerful words on the power of unbalanced love. Jon |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
dang! don't I know what you mean??!!!! |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"Still finding you in the silence of all journeys alone with passing fields reminders of summer's breath never the loneliness" Excellent write Gemma...much enjoyed the read. Hugs~
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Aenimal Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-18
Posts 7350the ass-end of space |
awesome gem, the only change i'd consider is this line in the second last verse. with the blossom fallen it's not the line itself, i just think it works better without, the preceeding lines sent the message through without the need for this metaphor |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
This is terrific Gem...I agree with Raph's suggestion as well ![]() into my library. Mxx What are you my god? You touch me like you are my god |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
"I would still bring you from behind the scented blossom air and I do despise myself." Love this Gem... ![]() |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice writing...James |
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Kaoru![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
This made me teary... |
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garysgirl![]() ![]() ![]()
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
from behind the scented blossom air Hi Gemma girl ![]() ![]() It's good to see you!! Iloved your poem, as always. And that part up there is awesome!! ![]() Hugs, my friend Ethel Mae |
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