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Tiersdin
Member Elite

since 2000-11-17

Posts 2364
east coast

0 posted 2004-06-20 10:44 AM

so the calm sets
like novocaine to
the aching nerve
I have no use for
ugly tomorrows
yet they roll in
on angry tides
seeking revenge

I have become a
spectator-
or is it a specter
in this monontonous
game of chance
I see the curve
but I am powerless
to avoid the hit

I am aware of the
tidal and tornado
but there never was
a shelter
I see calamity
but apathy goes
before the pain

so, calm sets
the numb, peaceful

Let it come

Let it all tumble
down...

~Tier

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

1 posted 2004-06-20 12:30 PM

what vivid imagery!

sadly expressive, love the ending lines

GG
Member Elite

since 2002-12-03

Posts 3532
Lost in thought

2 posted 2004-06-22 07:38 AM

This one has a strange ache in it...
the kind you can't be quite sure if you want or not.
Guess that's why it's apathy.
I agree with Dix, I love the ending!

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
Joyce kilmer

LeeJ
Member Patricius

since 2003-06-19

Posts 13296

3 posted 2004-06-22 08:23 AM

come what may? No matter, we will prevail, no matter what, cause we know, it's all part of a bigger more brilliant plot.

Lovely write.

PKreturns
Member

since 2003-07-21

Posts 362
New Orleans, LA

4 posted 2004-06-22 08:41 AM

I love this...let the peaceful calm of nothingness wash over me...I only wish.

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

5 posted 2004-06-22 07:16 PM

sometimes it can be a blessing.

Lovely to read your work.

All of my impurities are right here on my sleeve. This is Me"---Faith Hill

Susan
Member Ascendant

since 2004-03-27

Posts 5104
walking the surreal

6 posted 2004-06-22 08:19 PM

I am reading so many interesting writes today. I really like how this one reads, how it is expressed, though I am saddened by its hopelessness.

Susan

Happiness isn't something that happens to you, it's created from within you. Joy is a state of mind.

Aenimal
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-11-18

Posts 7350
the ass-end of space

7 posted 2004-06-22 11:23 PM

that about sums things up thanks..urgh

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

8 posted 2004-06-23 01:57 AM

I have become a
spectator-
or is it a specter
in this monontonous
game of chance
I see the curve
but I am powerless
to avoid the hit

Fabulous writing~~~

Enjoyed very much, Tiersdin~

iliana
Member Patricius

since 2003-12-05

Posts 13434
USA

9 posted 2004-06-23 02:01 AM

Somedays we do feel powerless but I believe the simple act of creating something like your very well written poem makes a difference. It's creation instead of destruction.

...jo

gemjop
Member Elite

since 2002-11-18

Posts 2587
Pencilveinia, USA

10 posted 2004-06-24 09:59 AM

too many great lines to quote, I can't choose, so I won't, this'll go into my library instead.

vandana

Member Patricius

since 1999-10-22

Posts 10463
USA

11 posted 2004-06-24 10:19 AM

enjoyed

RMW
Senior Member

since 2001-03-21

Posts 1424

12 posted 2004-06-24 10:50 AM

" ... let it all tumble..." I like that.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

13 posted 2004-06-24 11:23 AM

You wrote of the road to apathy, very well. However, I do not believe that is a road that a wondrously creative and loving soul such as yourself, need walk down.

An eloquent expression of loneliness and sorrow.
I pray the sun will shine on your morrow.

EA

Ericc
Member Elite

since 2003-01-31

Posts 4178

14 posted 2004-06-24 04:06 PM

What an awesome write!

Eric

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