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Open Poetry #32
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GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought

0 posted 2004-06-08 02:34 AM



Try and try,
and fall again.

My world
sank down beneath the floor.

"You disappoint the Dad in me,"
he said,
and so I braced for more.

Silence.

And he left me there,
Shivering the cold alone.

Try and try
but still
I fail,
to get up on my own.


Some background (for those who don't want to translate it their own way, though I certainly don't mind if you do - that's what poetry is about!), since I know I'll end up spilling my guts anyway... this was from awhile ago when my father wanted me to get up for something. Well, the bruise on my leg proves that I tried to... it's just that I fell back down again. And from there, I think the poem explains itself.


Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

© Copyright 2004 GG - All Rights Reserved
iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
1 posted 2004-06-08 03:27 AM


  Well, sweet one.  You certainly do not fail at writing -- it is but one of the many talents that you must have within you (along with that beautiful caring heart of yours) -- As you age, you'll find there is really a good bit of difference in the way men and women think about things(we're at our closest in thought when we're young, I think).  So, Dad's and daughters -- now, that's really a mind trip.  I was really, really lucky to have the Dad I had -- he died when I was 26.  That was quite some time ago, but I still miss him.  
passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
2 posted 2004-06-08 03:35 AM


I never got along with my father...he was Navy all the way...and I was a rebel.

If he died today I wouldn't go to the funeral.

Alyssa, I love you and I hate to know that you feel this way...you just try your best and you'll never fail.

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
3 posted 2004-06-08 03:47 AM


jo,
yeah, I know the difference in how the male mind works, and to an extent I deal with it fine... but my judgements and perceptions of people are based on what they should be, and on their willingness to change. He just isn't, and I guess thats where I have a problem. Telling your daughter that you're disappointed in her when she can't walk - it just crosses a border with me... I expected more of him. Luckily though my father and I know our boundaries well. I clean house and he works... conversations are best kept to theological debates (he really is smart!) and jokes (not so funny!). He is a great guy, and I'm lucky to have him as my father.
I'm glad you had your father ...26 is still so young and I imagine the missing would be terrible. Hold on to memories...
Thanks so much for your all too sweet (with no complaints!) reply

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
4 posted 2004-06-08 03:53 AM


Dix,
I really am blessed with the father I have, I just expect more of him. The situation with your father is devistating. I think there aren't really many good fathers out there any more, you have to search hard for them. But there aren't many people as strong and caring as you are, either. I wish that things could get better for you... I'll keep trying, but you have to, too
Thanks so much...

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
5 posted 2004-06-08 06:29 AM


I was lucky, Alyssa. I had good parents although from a time period where they didn't show much affection..maybe that is why I seem to need it more.


M

LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

6 posted 2004-06-08 06:44 AM


GG you are blessed and he loves you the best that he knows how...enjoy reading you, thanks a bunch for sharing.
Hugs Lee J.

Sadelite
Member Elite
since 2003-10-11
Posts 2519

7 posted 2004-06-08 10:18 AM


He believes so much in you Alyssa, that he's pulling out the most powerful words he can; he doesn't mean them-he wants to get you on your feet at any loss to his own.  You have not failed.  You try.  Sometimes when I'm frustrated because I can't fix everything, I walk away.  He, too?  Don't we all walk away at times?

You are so a gift to us all, and I bet, a special gift to him.
             luv ya,
                 Sae

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
8 posted 2004-06-08 10:51 AM


You are a Golden Girl to me and you are a winner all the way. I really like you, Alyssa. You are bright, kind, open, talented, and honest. Yeppers! You're a winner!


Linda

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
9 posted 2004-06-08 11:02 AM


enjoy your read
GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
10 posted 2004-06-08 12:58 PM


M,
it's hard when parents don't show affection, and it definitely does carry on with us through the rest of our life. Guess thats why there are so many patterns of behaviour through generations. I remember the last two times my father hugged me... have to streth to over 3 years ago, though. And when he told me he loved me? too long ago to remember now. Guess that's typical, though. Thank you...

LeeJ,
yeah, I'm sure he does... just have to remind myself of that I guess. Thanks so much for your reply

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

GG
Member Elite
since 2002-12-03
Posts 3532
Lost in thought
11 posted 2004-06-08 01:09 PM


Cathy,
I guess we do all walk away sometimes... but I don't walk away from those I love, guess I just expected the same from him. Not being able to walk sometimes is one of the most humiliating things I've had to face. It's hard for me to understand how someone could walk away from that. Guess we're all different, though.
You're a gift to me Thanks for your thoughtful reply.

Linda,
wow, refreshing things to hear.. can't say I believe them all, but still, good to hear! Thank you for your always cheerful and kind reply...

vandana,
I'm glad you enjoyed thank you much...

Always, Alyssa

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
                  Joyce kilmer

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