»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #32
»
april in paris (rained)
| Open Poetry #32 |
|
april in paris (rained) |
|
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738
|
It seemed like wisdom at the time a dossier demanded ink of the red juice stamping pad "Entry" and a cordon bleu I knew a certain slice of moon sometimes in her light I wept the glances left a lesser blow as fables were unfurled in debt of pain in promise twice today. Sometimes I forgot to pay so I ducked the corners bright creeping in the blue lamplight wickering the halo'd edge... yea who pays for violins mocking in the fingertips? Linen and a rotting cork dropping crumbs upon my lips as I sniff applaud bouquet in nod agreement of "good year"? "Yes, indeed, it was," I say, swirling patterns in the glass looking for the clouds of past there, in my claret... I'm wishing for a cigarette - wishing that I could speak French-- wiping lipstick with the white linen now forever stained laughing hidden on my lap as I lick my teeth in curl wondering why anyone craves Paris in the spring... [This message has been edited by serenity blaze (05-09-2004 02:20 AM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2004 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
gads...the many layers of knowing, I lift another word... and get a whole other view... you even have me wishing for a cig, and I don't smoke. |
||
|
velociraptor Junior Member
since 2003-07-23
Posts 12 |
Nice poem i like it, it really shows alot and is very emotional, i reckon its a good poem good going Daniel  |
||
|
Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
"Yes, indeed, it was," I say, swirling patterns in the glass looking for the clouds of past there, in my claret... I'm wishing for a cigarette - wishing that I could speak French-- wiping lipstick with the white linen now forever stained laughing hidden on my lap as I lick my teeth in curl wondering why anyone craves Paris in the spring... Oh I could see those clouds of past swirling around in your claret, and that lick of teeth in curl. Sighh..thanks for taking me there Gorgeous. M xx The clouds never expect it when it rains, but the sea, changes colours, but the sea, does not change. |
||
|
icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
"I knew a certain slice of moon sometimes in her light I wept" Wonderful! |
||
|
Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
serenity, In this ping pong match the ball never stops.  |
||
|
Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
"I'm wishing for a cigarette - wishing that I could speak French-- wiping lipstick with the white linen now forever stained laughing hidden on my lap as I lick my teeth in curl wondering why anyone craves Paris in the spring..." Gawd yer good! love this lady~ ~ Trace my body with your words, |
||
|
Edder Senior Member
since 2003-04-02
Posts 671 |
you're brilliant, yanno?  |
||
|
iliana Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434USA |
Gapping in total awe! |
||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow |
||
Greeneyes  
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
you just have that way about you..... it's ALL good! ~~**~~ |
||
|
brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
winner |
||
|
Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
I must've missed this one, and what a shame it would be if it kept going.. Your talent amazes me, and I can't get enough. Thank you, you're an inspiration. |
||
|
muted
since 2004-01-15
Posts 2949Elapsing, Eclipsing, Evolving |
damn |
||
|
MGROVES
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802california |
ah the french, loved this, your really good. not that the french side of me is prejidice or anything. ha ha. this was excellant. thanks |
||
|
Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
This has such a wonderul, sad, romantic feel to it. you could easily write fiction (novels). Corinne |
||
|
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
Has sort of a "Play it again, Sam" feel to it... You really pull the reader into that world with your vividly descriptive writing.  Linda |
||
|
wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Hrummph! Glamour, I tell ya! All Glamour! Sheesh *wink* |
||
|
serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
and yep, yeti, I believe you "got" it... this one was just a bit of a play on the loveless union and the death of romantic notion... Thanks again, all for reading! |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
