How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Sanctuary Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives

A home without a wall,
Our haven without ends,
A circle we all call
Our Family of Friends!

navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #31 » Whisper to Me
Open Poetry #31
Post A Reply Post New Topic Whisper to Me Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
ChemicalRepose
Member
since 2004-03-28
Posts 102
0 posted 2004-03-28 08:36 PM

Chose my path
with great care
we don't mind
we won't dare
to think to
question you
only bear to live
up to you

Your standards
are our quest
in this life
to feel at rest
with great needs
you show us
that we need to
obey you

God
won't you hear
my eulogy
and see I'm weary
and let me feel worthy

This is all
not what it seems
like a fool
you've betrayed me
© Copyright 2004 Ben - All Rights Reserved
ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353
Michigan, USA
1 posted 2004-03-28 08:44 PM

Your writes this eve are intense and anguished.  What perfection the ache takes upon the page.
Good wishes and all prayers.
TD
ChemicalRepose
Member
since 2004-03-28
Posts 102
2 posted 2004-03-28 08:49 PM

Thanks for the positive criticism.
MGROVES
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2004-02-01
Posts 3802
california
3 posted 2004-03-28 11:07 PM

very intense writing. i can feel your pain
my prayers are with you


          


Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #31 » Whisper to Me

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary