Open Poetry #31 |
The Rise And Fall Of Wealth At Heart |
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
With three ex-wives expelled from mind. In sullen space he loomed and moped his distant memories mulled in smoke, with pillars of distaste inside. But every day his heart evoked silent thoughts of love regained a search for happiness through pain. Filled flush with wealth under his roof true to a fault with money's hope enticing minds with regal show and words to pitch his worth aloof. His song would trap a callow soul, with flash of kindness in deceit a merchant of contrived relief. But when she came one month, to clean, The darkness of his thoughts went dry, then sunward went his soul on high and filled with life his heart broke free! The shadows of his latter pride were lit with daylight and unchained from the guileness of his game. Then, too, she brought his faith to swell. His needs beheld in her sweet face uplifted by her tender grace. On him, like gentle rain she fell to water wisdom once displaced. He offered her his wealth and fame and at her feet he threw his gain. He watched her soft eyes slowly drop Stoned innocence filled her light laugh then she spoke pure unabashed deep words of love spilled from her thoughts. He heard a river's length of love to last, about her boyfriend and their plans and her eyes glowed solely for her man. Through years of trading he had fought where friends were shallow, fierce and dim where all the world was made to win and render profits at all cost. Yet this songbird sang over him from her nest of silver dreams and left him helpless and unclean Ain't doin nothin at all |
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© Copyright 2004 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved | |||
Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
You carried this form beautifully throughout the poem. I truly appreciate the difficulty (Though perhaps not to you)of the rhyming scheme Very well done indeed, and a great poem, too Liz |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
what a story...whew! I was on the edge till the end! |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Yet this songbird sang over him from her nest of silver dreams ~*~ Lady Santos gave the best reply... all I can do is |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
I thank you Liz, Passing and Sunshine....I surely do appreciate the read and the comments. |
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Greeneyes
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903In Your Poetic Mind |
Yet this songbird sang over him from her nest of silver dreams''''' ~ poetically beautifully! ~~**~~ |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Eric Beautiful story in perfect form. Bravo! |
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Nightshade
since 2001-08-31
Posts 13962just out of reach |
Simply wonderful writing. Enjoyed. Chris Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
But when she came one month, to clean, The darkness of his thoughts went dry, then sunward went his soul on high and filled with life his heart broke free! The shadows of his latter pride were lit with daylight and unchained from the guileness of his game. ================================= Eric the rhyme scheme in this is most impressive...as is your assonance and vocabulary... you work magic with lyric and verse. A soul poet with blues and rhyme in your viens... ya cant miss with that combo. Outstanding write groovy guy. Home is a feeling I buried in you ... |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
But every day his heart evoked silent thoughts of love regained a search for happiness through pain You captured something profound in this very beautiful "Rise and Fall of wealth at heart". A touch of melancholy remains ... this is life. Love, Margherita |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Martie and Lauren thank you so much for the kind words......I appreciate the read and the response. Eric |
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Honeybunch Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115South Africa |
Yes, indeed an excellent read. Sounds like an awakening to me. |
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