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BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside

0 posted 2004-03-11 09:52 PM



~*~

You never missed a beat
it didn't fit your script
that might give away your motives
but you knew I was watching
holding my breath past go.

While you took turns
and kept me guessing
plotting your own mystery
between auditions and leading ladies
turning out a comedy of errors.

Oh I knew my lines by heart
but she had real talent
you were good together
but you couldn't see it
each take was no different
she was always on.

I miss her dignity and simple elegance
she was first class
in a league of her own
a many splendored woman
who graced her audience at every turn.

But your needs demanded attention
relentless
until her spirit broke
cut from your act
without a second glance
as she fled the nearest exit
never to return.

Unlike myself who remained
a few rows back
with stars in my eyes
resembling a tear
that wasn't.

~*~

© Copyright 2004 BluesSerenade - All Rights Reserved
Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
1 posted 2004-03-11 09:56 PM


"Unlike myself who remained
a few rows back
with stars in my eyes
resembling a tear
that wasn't."

Powerful write Bluesy...
Very much enjoyed.
~Smiles & Hugs, Nancy~

Poetry is not an opinion expressed...
it is a song that rises from a bleeding wound
...or a smiling mouth.

         ~  Kahlil Gibran

DavePage
Member Elite
since 2003-12-21
Posts 2917

2 posted 2004-03-11 10:18 PM


Very powerfull but write the rest of the understudy

Dave

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
3 posted 2004-03-11 10:32 PM


Dear Nancy, thank you very much for reading,
This isn't so much about "him"
and more about a certain poetess who has been gone too long.  

Hi Dave and thanks~  If I were to write the rest,
I might give the end away.       

Greeneyes
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
4 posted 2004-03-11 10:51 PM


very powerful Lori.....you are so graceful in your writing...and each time I walk away learning more....hugss

~~**~~
Walking with bare feet
among a tapestry of words,
each woven thread, awakening the soul
~~**~~

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
5 posted 2004-03-11 10:59 PM


wow
tell it like it is girl......
i wish she'd come back tho, not be scared off by a big bad wolf
very strong write

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
6 posted 2004-03-11 11:31 PM


Thank you Ladies, you know who loves you baby~
steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

7 posted 2004-03-12 12:37 PM


this is very good...the ending is so strong...

"with stars in my eyes
resembling a tear
that wasn't."

well scripted

passing shadows
Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577
displaced
8 posted 2004-03-12 02:10 AM


a little sad
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
9 posted 2004-03-12 06:27 AM


Lovely theatre metaphors that fit the language of this poem so well and a precious though sad ebding.....However, a reality exposed that many will relate to......Excellent work.....Serenaded me all the way through...


Eric

iliana
Member Patricius
since 2003-12-05
Posts 13434
USA
10 posted 2004-03-15 01:19 AM


Bluesy -- great write, and I'll be watching for more.   ........jo
EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
11 posted 2004-03-15 04:40 AM


I much enjoyed this excellent write!
PKreturns
Member
since 2003-07-21
Posts 362
New Orleans, LA
12 posted 2004-03-15 12:53 PM


Wow...this tells a story a story so well.

Kinda sad, but beautiful.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
13 posted 2004-03-15 01:13 PM


Lori, any man would be fortunate to have you as his leading lady! What a sensitive and beautifully poetic heart you have!

Warm hugs,
Linda

icebox
Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383
in the shadows
14 posted 2004-03-15 02:17 PM


Haunting!
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

15 posted 2004-03-15 03:20 PM


Hi Lori...Love every line from the beginning to the end.  You go girl, you go!

M

Beauty of the world which is soon to perish has two edges, one of laughter and one of anguish, cutting the heart asunder.
(by Virginia Woolf)

James_A_Fraser
Senior Member
since 2003-09-03
Posts 972
Out Making Anticlines
16 posted 2004-03-15 07:13 PM


I am too intimately acquainted with this feeling to talk about the topic -- but I can say you carried it off really well, darn you -- brought back the feeling in spades!



~~J

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