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SimpleDiscourse
Member

since 2003-04-24

Posts 79

0 posted 2003-10-12 08:47 PM

Cross-room glaces
From gray eyes
Evoke feelings I'd left behind
Hidden in pockets
[I wore my heart up my sleeve]
So I'll send you myself
In an envelope
On which says:
To the boy I can't seem to get rid of
And when you open it
And I appear
There better be a smile in those gray eyes
I won't have it
Any other way

Cross-room glances
From gray eyes
Bring back memories
Of silent
awkward
late night
car rides
And I remember
the way the moon reflected off your face
the way the wind from the open window
flushed your cheeks
And I remember thinking that
just in that moment you were flawless
[I wear my heart on my sleeve]
So I'll send you my heart
In an envelope
And when you open it
And it appears
There better be a smile in those gray eyes
I won't have it
Any other way.

Spine Grinder
Senior Member

since 2000-10-28

Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...

1 posted 2003-10-12 09:00 PM

Wow...I really liked this. Very descriptive. Great job.

"I'm tired of being what you want me to be."~Linkin Park

dertah
Senior Member

since 2003-06-18

Posts 584

2 posted 2003-10-12 10:17 PM

good onnnnnnnneeeeeee. (this has been a complicated thought from hatred)

peachesNcream
Senior Member

since 2001-08-21

Posts 513
Ocean Of Tears

3 posted 2003-10-13 02:33 PM

This was a great poem! The imagery was great and everything was real descriptive. Great work! ~Jess

"Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go." -Herman Hesse

WinterWren
Senior Member

since 2002-12-01

Posts 1044
...Coming to

4 posted 2003-10-13 03:54 PM

I really love this one! It touched me. Perfect job! Thank you for sharing.

W.W.
We were meant to live for so much more have we lost ourselves?
Maybe redemption has stories to tell maybe forgiveness is right where you fell.

Silent Evincar
Member

since 2003-07-22

Posts 179
Here There and Places Between

5 posted 2003-10-14 09:31 PM

Honestly, that whole first stanza could've ended the whole thing; but the second part made it better. I like how the heart on my sleeve pops up just outta nowhere even though you kinda expect it. I have nothing but a smile in my brown eyes when I read this.... very good.

NJS

SilentTears
Member

since 2003-02-15

Posts 371
Lost and Broken

6 posted 2003-10-15 10:43 AM

WOW!!! Beautiful work. The imagery was AWESOME...I could picture everything. I felt it the whole way through. Nice job! Definitely going in my library for future reading!!!

*I figured out that trust was just my one mistake...*

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